Hello and Welcome

Paul Bains, B.Sc., M.A., RCC, is a Registered Clinical Counsellor with the British Columbia Association of Clinical Counsellors (BCACC) and has a Masters of Arts (M.A.) degree from City University. Paul has over 30 years of experience helping couples, families, children, adolescents and individual adults.

Specializing in marriage counselling/therapy, family counselling/therapy and anger management counselling. Other areas of specialization include stress management, alcohol & drug counselling, grief & loss, anxiety, depression, workplace issues, trauma & abuse, self-esteem, diversity issues, domestic violence issues and End of Life Care & Counselling. Paul is also an approved counsellor for the Crime Victim Assistance Program (CVAP) and ICBC. 

Marriage & Family Counselling- Do you struggle with any of the following?

• Communication difficulties in your Marriage/Relationships.
• Infidelity.
• Having the same arguments/fights in your relationship.
• Loss of emotional connection with your partner.
• Sexual issues and lack of intimacy.
• Sex or Porn Addiction Issues
• Physical (Domestic Violence) and/or Emotional abuse in your marriage or relationship.
• Parenting issues with children and /or teens.
• Struggles with in-laws.
• Step-family (Blended family) issues.
• Cultural issues impacting your marriage, family or self.

Other struggles or issues you may be dealing with:

• Grief, Bereavement and Loss.
• Stress, Anxiety and/or Anger.
• Alcohol and Drug Issues
• Feeling depressed.
• Abuse and trauma.
• Workplace issues.
• Low self-esteem.
• Loss of hope.
• Spiritual Issues.
• Same problems, feelings, thoughts or doubts limiting your life.
• ICBC referrals accepted.
• CVAP (Crime Victim Assistance program) counselling referrals accepted.

If you struggle with some of the above issues, then Paul Bains can help you. Some of the benefits you can gain or learn by working with Paul are stated in the areas listed below:

Marriage, Couple, Relationship Counselling & Family Counselling Benefits:

• Create or develop the healthy and positive marriage/relationship you want.
• Gain or re-gain hope for yourself and/or your relationships.
• Resolve, develop and strengthen intimacy in your marriage/relationship.
• Learn to talk with your partner/spouse to get the positive outcome you want.
• Understand that you and your partner will fight, but understand why you fight.
• Come to a better understanding of your partner.
• Restore or rebuild trust in your marriage/relationship.
• Sort out and discuss feelings if you are thinking about separation or divorce.
• Come to terms with infidelity. Learn to trust again.
• Learn to accept and come to terms with your partner's differences.
• Interracial couple issues.
• Resolve family issues positively and effectively.
• Resolve issues with extended family.
• Improve your step-family issues and gain a better understanding of your family.
• Improve Parenting Skills with success and love it.
• Spiritual struggles in marriage.
• Understand that the answers are within you to improve your marriage or family issues.

Benefits of Grief & Loss Counselling:

• Learn to live with the loss of a loved one.
• Understand and manage the intense feelings you may have.
• Understand the unique way you grieve and how this can help you.

Benefits of Anger & Stress Management, Anxiety, Depression, Trauma & Abuse Counselling:

• Manage Anger and Stress so that you can live a more effective life.
• Resolve trauma. Gain awareness of the feelings that you are having and manage them better.
• Increase your self-esteem to have a more meaningful life.
• Find realistic, practical and meaningful change.
• Discover your inner strength, resources and wisdom - the answers are within you.
• Enjoy your life more fully.
• Accept yourself, partner, family or others in your life.
• Reduce, manage or overcome anxiety, fear, depression and isolation.
• Communicate effectively and positively with others.

Benefits of Counselling for Work Place issues:

• Gain more confidence and assertiveness in your workplace.
• Manage your stress and/or anger effectively.
• Deal effectively with the office bully.
• Communicate effectively with work colleagues.
• Learn how to motivate yourself, set goals and gain more focus on what you want.

Paul Bains uses a collaborative, realistic, practical and integrative approach that suits your unique marriage, family and individual needs. It is important that clients know that they are coming to a counsellor who can truly help them. Paul Bains uses effective, well-researched counselling techniques and theories to help his clients better.   Some of the approaches, theories and models Paul uses are:

• Gottman Method Couples Therapy (Level 1 & 2)
• Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy
• Imago Couples Therapy
• Integrative Behavioral Couple Therapy
• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (couples, families & individuals)
• Solution Focused Therapy and Brief Therapy Models (couples, families & individuals)
• Narrative Therapy (couples, families and individuals)
• Family Systems Therapy and various Parenting models
• Parent Teen Mediation

Paul Bains will work with you to co-create the realistic, practical and meaningful change you want to see. He will provide a trusting, warm, caring and safe environment to explore and resolve your concerns. Paul uses his extensive experience (life and work) and educational training to determine the underlying issues in your marriage, family or individual self so you can move forward with your life. Paul believes that people want to have their beliefs, values and ways of being respected. Counselling needs to focus on the client's preferred ways of being, and to that end, Paul will work with you. Paul can help you effectively gain awareness and help you connect to your inner resources for healing.

It is the relationship between a client and therapist that is the best indicator of success in therapy. To this end, Paul offers his clients a free 30-minute consultation to see for themselves what counselling can offer and how it will benefit them. Paul Bains is confident that you will feel that you are working with a counsellor who hears what you are saying and understands how to effectively support you. Paul's hope in serving you is to offer you skills, experience, wisdom and a real connection.

Paul Bains has been married for 25 years and has two adult children. As a married parent, Paul understands the challenges that couples and families face in daily life. This lived experience, along with his training and education, is what Paul brings to your marriage, your family, and you.

Paul Bains provides service to the Lower Mainland area. He is also an e-counsellor and can provide video or telephone counselling.

Evening, early morning and weekend appointments are available for your convenience. Flexible schedule.

To schedule your free 30-minute initial session or to ask for more information on how Paul's experience can help you in a positive and meaningful direction, call him at 604.910.4920 or www.marriagefamilyhelp.com or e-mail at: paul@marriagefamilyhelp.com