Great Couples Counseling in Lakeside, VA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Married, partnered, exclusive, non-exclusive, gay, straight, cis, trans, or poly…relationships are tough. Being in relationship with another human being is the hardest work we will ever do. Whether you’re struggling with something as painful as infidelity or as simple as whether to get another cat, we can help you find your way back to where you want to be.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

I enjoy working with couples we want to improve their communication. I totally believe that is the one place where we are weakest, in our ability to communicate with our partner. Learning more about ourselves actually can improve our ability to communicate with others, but then we take the next step to learn about our partner. Learning how to show appreciation, understanding and acceptance are the best parts of being together.

Couples, whether married, preparing for marriage, or in a committed relationship can be guided toward wholeness by focusing on positive aspects of the relationship. Appropriate and respectful attention is given to concerns as they arise. Suggestions for activities and exercises are assigned as homework when there is receptivity to work outside of the counseling hour. The couple can expect clarification of individual goals as well as clarity about how each person's life goals can support the other.

While each relationship is unique, there are common issues that create conflict and/or distance between partners. How they deal with these issues can either create a stronger bond, or tear couples apart. Often times, couples believe they are fighting about what feels like an insurmountable number of issues. They become opponents as opposed to a team. I help them identify the underlying theme or themes, to narrow their focus to the root of the problem. With improved communication and conflict resolution skills, couples can begin to work through these issues and find more security and enjoyment in their relationship.

My Approach is Different: I spend more time preparing for a session than the average marriage counselor, often an hour, and do so free of charge! I also spend more time between sessions, not just 10 minutes, so I am fully prepared to work on your case. Moreover, my "hour" is an actual 60 minutes, not a "therapy hour," defined to mean something less. My approach is diametrically opposed to that of one therapist who said "that 45- or 50-minute sessions allow therapists to offer a fresh perspective and remain objective without getting too immersed in a client’s life." "Too immersed?" I don't get that. Couples appreciate my full dedication to their success and happiness as a couple.

There are two most basic fears of intimacy that we all have: one is fear of abandonment, the other is fear of being taken over, of losing my autonomy. In a relationship, people often become polarized with one clinging and the other seeming distant. With awareness of our fears and how to take care of ourselves and each other, we will bring out the best in each other. Everyone knows how to speak and listen, right? Not so. The most difficult skills to learn are to speak self-responsibly about your own experience and to truly listen and understand the other person's experience even when you don't like it. To learn these skills enables love. I can help.

Our team of therapists can help you face your specific relationship issues as a couple and tailor a treatment plan specifically for you. Our team of counselors come from a wide variety of backgrounds, so we're confident we can find you help that's best suited for your unique challenges and goals. Working with us, you'll get results. Please don't wait, we're ready to help you today.