Anger Management and Counseling in Montrose, VA.

Dr. Nedra Voorhies, LPC believes that anger is frequently misinterpreted as negative emotion rather than a source of healing energy. She believes that anger can be perceived as positive energy and can be put to use as a resource for increased health and vitality. Anger can be an incredible gift to affirm life goals and direction. The client will learn to embrace anger rather than fear it

Anger isn't a primary emotion--It's an animal with its leg caught in a trap. It's a reaction to feeling threatened. I don't want to manage people's anger--I want to reduce their anger by minimizing that experience of feeling threatened. In my many years of counseling, I've found that almost all of our feelings of threat arise from the time of our life when we were most vulnerable--that is, our childhood. If you come to me for assistance in dealing with the anger that is hurting you & hurting the people around you, then I will want to dive into your memories as a little one, healing those wounds, clarifying those distorted thoughts, enhancing your sense of your current strength & competency.

Anger is a natural response to hurt and fear but it can cause more pain in our lives if we use it to hurt others, physically or emotionally. Anger that is destructive, usually comes from an old hurt that we are carrying within us. This hurt has been painfully touched by circumstances or by the actions of someone else. First we need to learn ways to stop our hurtful actions by taking a break or walking away. Then, however, we need to turn our attention to the underlying hurt and to bring compassion and care to our own hurt self. You will find that at the same time, you become more compassionate toward other people.

Anger is a tough emotion. It feels so real and raw in the moment, that we forget that it’s simply a defense mechanism. As human beings, we like to feel powerful. Vulnerable emotions are dangerous. Sadness, fear, jealousy, hurt, and betrayal make us feel weak, so what do we do? We try to look strong, scary, and powerful. Anger is the most efficient way to do this. If we can sit with our more vulnerable feelings and care for them, we are able to see our anger evaporate. We’ll work together to create a safe space for you to explore what’s hiding beneath your anger. The freedom that comes with vulnerability is where your true power lies.

Appropriate anger management is a skill that can be learned. Often times, people that struggle with anger management were never given the tools to regulate their emotions. Through exploration of our triggers, understanding and changing the messages we attach to these triggers, and learning to regulate our physiological arousal state, we can successfully implement de-escalation strategies and return to a place of calm. *Please note, I do not work with domestic violence issues although I am happy to provide referrals.

If your spouse, boss, or a judge has insisted you begin anger management classes, we can help. I offer scheduling options that are flexible for your life. Our class assists you with identifying your triggers, understanding worldview, identifying judgement and learning how to be less reactive. Discussion typically occurs over 8 - 10 hours, $30 per hour.

Our team of therapists can help you face your specific anger management issues and tailor a treatment plan specifically for you. Our team of counselors come from a wide variety of backgrounds, so we're confident we can find you help that's best suited for your unique challenges and goals. Working with us, you'll get results. Please don't wait, we're ready to help you today.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.