Anger Management and Counseling in Quinlan, TX.

Anger is really a secondary emotion. Often it is driven by intrapsychic feelings of fear, or frustration, or early life trauma that has been repressed below the level of consciousness. When we experience sudden onset of anger that we cannot fully understand or explain, that can be an indicator that counseling could be of some help. Ungrieved loss, unfinished family business, and unregulated emotions can all lead to anger that is out of control and unmerited for the situation. Family Systems counseling can help clients become more differentiated, more mature and more capable of recognizing the difference between feeling and thinking--leading to better relationships and a more joyous life.

Being angry is not bad, it is what we do with it that can be destructive to ourselves and our relationships. I can help you identify unhealthy anger patterns and triggers. Sessions will consist of learning how your anger was learned and re-learning healthier ways of handling it. Understanding your anger will help prevent future relationship conflict and build more confidence for you as a person.

As a Certified Anger Resolution Therapist, I understand that you may have already tried to control your frustration or someone else may be telling you that your anger is a problem. Either way, I recognize that you have been doing the best you can but you need some help to achieve consistent management of your anger. During counseling, I will teach you methods individualized for your specific needs to help you recognize triggers and control your responses.

Managing our emotions appropriately is a skill that is learned. This skill takes time, but with continued dedication and education, you will be on a track to positive emotional mental health. We teach you to understand your triggers and to minimize any negative outbursts. We do however understand that strong angry emotions can get the best of us regardless of our efforts to avoid triggers. We help you learn to manage your emotions while in the moment without responding in ways we regret in the future.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

My approach revolves around helping clients gain a deep understanding of the root causes and triggers of their anger. I provide a supportive and non-judgmental space where clients can explore their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors associated with anger. Through evidence-based techniques and strategies, clients will benefit by learning healthier ways to express and manage their anger, enhancing their communication skills, and ultimately regaining control over their reactions.

In my experience as an EMDR therapist, I pay close attention to the links between past and present. I’ve seen time and time again how unhealed emotional wounds resurface and come out sideways. While anger management can provide helpful strategies, they don’t get to the heart of the issue. Often, anger is what we see on the surface, but the real problem is what’s underneath the anger. Negative beliefs like “I’m helpless,” “I’m out of control,” and “I’m a failure,” start to bubble up, and anger comes to the rescue. It can get us in trouble, but at least it gets the blood pumping. With research-proven EMDR therapy, I help men heal anger at its source so it doesn’t have to be managed.

I believe that anger is often greatly misunderstood. It is much more complex than yelling and rage.. As a result I often talk to my patients about what kind of pain they are experiencing. Frequently when I do so I notice a great deal of relief and even tears. Patients explain that they often feel a great deal of relief when I speak to them in this fashion. I then go on to teach them about the nature of change and how that they can gain relief. One important element of this will often be to assist them in understanding the neurophysiology of their anger. With this I teach them the skills of how they can begin to retrain their thinking and their behaviors in service of lasting change.