Family Counseling Services in Saddle Brook, NJ.

We come from a systems approach when working with families. We teach family members how to communicate more effectively with one another. There is an emphasis on personal responsibility and each family member looking at how their behavior is contributing to the problems. Building empathy between family members is also a main focus for us when working with families. We strive for families to leave sessions feeling more connected and understood by each other with the tools to be more successful in their communications. We do family therapy both in the office and in homes.

I offer family therapy for children 8 and up all the way to adult children wanting family therapy with aging parents. We'll start with a thorough assessment of what's going on and your goals as a family. We'll learn new ways to express needs and address conflict. We'll look back at the family system over the last few generations, noting patterns, cultural heritage, strengths, and generational patterns that need to be changed. I'll walk with your family until things are in a better place--reach out anytime.

Family can be a wonderful source of strength and love, but the dynamism of so many individuals and their own needs and desires can also create different and new challenges. My goal as a therapist that works with both individuals and couples is to help you understand your family dynamics and needs so that I can provide you with the tools and techniques to thrive within your family life as it is now.

Keeping the family strong means that you have a strong support system around you. I work with the family to help members better understand the system that they have created, how it is functioning, and how it is serving them. The goal is to understand the system by assessing its strengths and weaknesses to better use it to support and sustain its members.

Distressed family members too often exclusively focus their efforts on changing their difficult sibling, parent, grandparent or in-law. This is ineffective. Difficult family members often resist such efforts. I teach each family member how to first work on changing their own self-defeating emotional and behavioral reactions in response to their difficult family members. Once someone calms down and not gets so upset about the other people in their family they can influence other people to find better ways to live with or at least gracefully tolerate each other. I show each family member how to work on themselves in order to have a better chance of influencing others. Think about this.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently deregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dysfunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

I teach family members a skill called the Intentional Dialogue to help improve family communication. Often family members don't feel heard, that what they say matters, understood and that others know what they are feeling. The Intentional Dialogue allows each family member to share their 'side of the story' in a safe environment without fearing being judged or criticized. When this happens family members start to work as a team rather than be adversarial.

The family can be the very foundation of support, comfort, and love, but it can also be the greatest source of stress, strain, and sorrow. Our compassionate and experienced family counselors help family members have a closer, stronger, and more rewarding relationship with each other and teach family members how to resolve conflict in a healthy way. Our counselors can assist parents to address the unique needs of children and adolescents with emotional, behavioral, communicative, and learning issues. They will help facilitate much-needed dialogue between feuding family members. The counselors will assess how best to treat the family. Sometimes, counseling will be conducted with the entire family present and sometimes with just the designated child. At...(view profile to read more)

Dr. Sara Mandelbaum and Dr. Joel Stukalin are expert consultants for short-term interventions with families, specifically related to child-rearing & blended family issues. They consult regularly with concerned parents and grandparents about family related issues that threaten the family health and integrity. Usually a few, comprehensive sessions with Dr. Joel or Dr. Sara lay the groundwork for a better understanding that leads to the resolution of family problems. Where necessary individulal counseling referrals can be made. Clients have stated that the focused, intelligent & solution-oriented approach from our sessions has often helped them derive necessary knowledge for family harmony

Originally trained as a family therapist at the Family Institute of Cambridge, Mass., I have evolved as an experienced family therapist. I believe that family therapy is generally the treatment of choice in resolving issues and preventing the problem from going to the next generation. It is useful to see an entire family but can also be beneficial if parts of a family will work together to overcome communication problems, resentments, and misunderstandings that can tear families apart. Family therapy is very helpful to resolving conflicts of adult children after a parent has died. It can also be useful with young children, siblings, as well as teenagers, middle-aged people and older adults.

My approach to family therapy is to look for the source of the family conflict. After over 37 years of practice, I can usually zero in on what is going on. Sometimes one parent is out of control. Sometimes parents are in conflict over child-rearing practices; one is too permissive and one too strict. Sometimes one child is favored over another. I generally meet with the whole family over a period of time, encouraging honest and constructive communication. Through patient guidance, the problems surface and are worked out.

When a loved one has an addiction or alcohol problem, the whole family suffers. The impact may not be immediately evident, but it is there, festering and creating anger, resentment, insecurity and other emotional and often financial issues. Families often feel beat up by the addict and then beat up by the treatment centers, who offer addict focused education and minimal family treatment. Who is supporting you, the family, when your family weekend is over? You loved one is released from treatment with an aftercare plan. What is your aftercare plan? Living with a newly recovering person doesn’t have to mean walking on eggshells. Compassionate family focused education, coaching and therapy help families heal and create lives worth living.

Families who come to Emerge redefine their goals individually and as a family unit. They gain an understanding of where their feelings and behaviors stem from and what they need to change. Within a matter of months families begin to see the growth and change that once was stagnant because they have now learned to communicate with one another through effective listening and reflective responding.

During Family Therapy we deal with: patterns of communication (the way people in the family talk to each other); anger (how that sabotages the family); correcting dysfunctional patters, and negotiation (how to work out things so that everybody feels O.K. about the solutions). During family counseling families learn how to deal with crisis as well conflict management techniques. Also included are effective parenting skills for both children as well as teenagers. Therapy needs to have practical strategies and to be as short term as possible.

In family counseling family members develop healthy ways of communicating and responding to one another to create and establish an atmosphere of trust and emotional safety. Family members learn to identify their own needs, increase sensitivity to the needs of others and interact in ways that build trust. Family counseling is conducted in an atmosphere of respect and dignity for all.

I enjoy doing both family counseling. I get to know each member of the family individually and the family dynamic, and how each person perceives the presenting problem. I am careful not to take sides and blame any one family member. All deserve respect. I work to learn more and to help you be more curious about whatever problem you are coming to me to resolve.

Nearly all families deal with some sort of stress or conflict at one point or another. In the middle of what can seem like the most difficult time for your family, actually lies opportunity. Through therapy, I can help family members begin to understand one another better, improve their communication, and resolve conflicts, leading to healthier and more secure relationships. Your family is the most powerful resource. Let’s strengthen it together.

Kids live in the context of their families, and I believe that when you work with kids, the family should be included because this is the best way to create change. As parents, you are the most important people in your children's lives, and I want to strengthen your connections with them. It is important to look at the cycles that families get into, and also to understand what prevents communication between kids and their parents. The therapy is tailored to the needs of your family, so who is present in each session may vary. I want to support individuals as well as restore and improve the connection between parents and their children. This also applies to adult children and their parents.

Family therapy is often times a necessary extention to individual therapy. Families are supposed to work as a system. Sometimes the system breaks down and one member may be viewed as the broken piece. Until the system comes together to work through what is really happening the problem often persists. In therapy together we can look at your system as a whole. Let's open lines of communication between family members, improve your relationships and begin enjoying your lives together again.

Teen therapy can require a family component. While your teen is the client, their effort is impacted by the dynamics at home. Including parents, and sometimes even siblings, in the process is important. Family therapy sessions are opportunities to get on the same page for supporting your teen and communicating more effectively as a team. You will all have a safe space to share your perspectives and express your needs in a structured, nonjudgemental environment. As the therapist, I will facilitate the discussion to ensure everyone is respected and heard. You will all leave with a greater understanding of each other and the pertinent tools and techniques to support your loved one.

We are part of something larger than ourselves and that is why we tend to encounter difficulties in dealing with simple things in life such as learning how to live together, raising children or coping with adolescence. In Family Therapy, as opposed to Individual Therapy, we explore, understand and address issues family members present at their source. Emotional origins of personal conflicts get exposed throughout roles and dynamics; part of my work with families include to question and re-frame them to mobilize stagnation and create room for new experiences.

I leverage a solution-based approach to clearly outline your primary challenge, work through an exercise to meditate on and define your future state and then work over 8 sessions to achieve it via homework and 1:1 sessions. Clients have experienced great success with this approach, my goal is to empower you - YOU have the answers and I want to help you find them.

Our music therapists specialize in reaching children, teens, and young adults, including those with special needs like autism, ADHD, and Down's syndrome, as well as siblings of children with special needs who are working to identify their role or voice in the family. Individualized music exercises conducted by our highly trained therapists can address coping strategies, social skills, functional speech, and more!

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently dysregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dystunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161

I always include parent(s) in all sessions so they can learn how to bring out the best in their children. I reach, teach, educate and motivate children to value and respect their parents. When children show gratitude not attitude it is much easier for parents to praise and show love rather than yelling, punishing, and restricting their children. The resulting harmonious relations improve the atmosphere of the entire household and the benefits extend to siblings.