Family Counseling Services in Lodi, NJ.

Distressed family members too often exclusively focus their efforts on changing their difficult sibling, parent, grandparent or in-law. This is ineffective. Difficult family members often resist such efforts. I teach each family member how to first work on changing their own self-defeating emotional and behavioral reactions in response to their difficult family members. Once someone calms down and not gets so upset about the other people in their family they can influence other people to find better ways to live with or at least gracefully tolerate each other. I show each family member how to work on themselves in order to have a better chance of influencing others. Think about this.

We are part of something larger than ourselves and that is why we tend to encounter difficulties in dealing with simple things in life such as learning how to live together, raising children or coping with adolescence. In Family Therapy, as opposed to Individual Therapy, we explore, understand and address issues family members present at their source. Emotional origins of personal conflicts get exposed throughout roles and dynamics; part of my work with families include to question and re-frame them to mobilize stagnation and create room for new experiences.

I teach family members a skill called the Intentional Dialogue to help improve family communication. Often family members don't feel heard, that what they say matters, understood and that others know what they are feeling. The Intentional Dialogue allows each family member to share their 'side of the story' in a safe environment without fearing being judged or criticized. When this happens family members start to work as a team rather than be adversarial.

Families who come to Emerge redefine their goals individually and as a family unit. They gain an understanding of where their feelings and behaviors stem from and what they need to change. Within a matter of months families begin to see the growth and change that once was stagnant because they have now learned to communicate with one another through effective listening and reflective responding.

Family can be a wonderful source of strength and love, but the dynamism of so many individuals and their own needs and desires can also create different and new challenges. My goal as a therapist that works with both individuals and couples is to help you understand your family dynamics and needs so that I can provide you with the tools and techniques to thrive within your family life as it is now.

We come from a systems approach when working with families. We teach family members how to communicate more effectively with one another. There is an emphasis on personal responsibility and each family member looking at how their behavior is contributing to the problems. Building empathy between family members is also a main focus for us when working with families. We strive for families to leave sessions feeling more connected and understood by each other with the tools to be more successful in their communications. We do family therapy both in the office and in homes.

It wasn't always this way. There was a time you looked forward to being with each other. There was trust and you enjoyed each other's company. Now it feels like there is an invisible wall separating you. Hal's soothing wisdom offers you the opportunity to learn the vital building blocks leading to a trusting and loving relationship. Hal is an experienced and highly regarded couples counselor. He is also a published author and was invited to appear as a special guest on David Lettermans Late Night television program on 2 separate occasions. Hal's schedule is flexible and appointments are available days, evenings and Sundays. Since 1975.

Family therapy is often times a necessary extention to individual therapy. Families are supposed to work as a system. Sometimes the system breaks down and one member may be viewed as the broken piece. Until the system comes together to work through what is really happening the problem often persists. In therapy together we can look at your system as a whole. Let's open lines of communication between family members, improve your relationships and begin enjoying your lives together again.

Originally trained as a family therapist at the Family Institute of Cambridge, Mass., I have evolved as an experienced family therapist. I believe that family therapy is generally the treatment of choice in resolving issues and preventing the problem from going to the next generation. It is useful to see an entire family but can also be beneficial if parts of a family will work together to overcome communication problems, resentments, and misunderstandings that can tear families apart. Family therapy is very helpful to resolving conflicts of adult children after a parent has died. It can also be useful with young children, siblings, as well as teenagers, middle-aged people and older adults.