Great Couples Counseling in Upper Saddle River, NJ. Therapy to heal relationships.

In my approach to couples counseling, I integrate the Gottman Method, a research-based approach designed to improve communication, resolve conflicts, and deepen emotional connection. Using this method, I help couples identify destructive patterns and replace them with healthy, constructive interactions. By focusing on building trust, fostering intimacy, and enhancing problem-solving skills, I guide couples toward a stronger, more resilient partnership. Couples benefit from a deeper understanding of each other, improved conflict resolution, and a renewed sense of connection and commitment.

I love working with couples and especially high conflict couples. I draw on the Gottman Method, an evidence-based couples therapy that starts with a detailed relationship checkup and great communication tools that will transform how you talk and listen to each other. Couples come to me for everything from dating challenges, premarital counseling, and marital check-ups to serious conflict, infidelity, ambivalence about staying together, and even recovering from emotional or physical abuse. I am trained to help you strengthen your relationship.

It can take us a lifetime to learn to accept the person we have chosen to live with, but it could also take us the same time to try to change that person and not be successful. Couples Therapy can help us understand that even though we all have the potential to change, we cannot change the other. We can learn how to accept the other person, live together or decide not to, and explore what are our own contributions to the dilemmas that we present.

Anger is not an aphrodisiac nor is it helpful in getting more of what you want. Couples in conflict often focus too much energy on changing their partner. The problem is that each partner does not have direct control over the other. The way out is of this dilemma is to learn how to not get so upset over what you dislike in your partner. I teach each partner how to improve their relationship by first modifying their own behavior. By having better control over your emotional and behavioral reactions you can more constructively communicate, negotiate and influence your partner. I teach you how to get your message across and positively influence your partner so that you can enjoy the results!

Each couple is unhappy in its own way, but the core of the unhappiness is always miscommunication. Generally each member of a couple brings bad communication habits to the relationship and these habits clash. I use an eclectic approach to couples therapy that combines the latest research, utilizing psychoanalysis, role playing, role reversal, video and practice in constructive communication skills. In time, couples learn to communicate in a way that leads to resolution, not conflict.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples focuses on strengthening the emotional bond between partners. Through structured sessions, we explore underlying patterns and attachment needs driving relationship dynamics. Using interventions aimed at fostering empathy and understanding, we facilitate open communication and emotional expression. Couples learn to recognize and address negative interaction cycles, replacing them with healthier patterns of connection and responsiveness. EFT emphasizes creating a secure attachment bond, fostering feelings of safety and trust within the relationship. By deepening emotional intimacy and building a stronger connection, couples experience wellness.

We know that even the healthiest relationships experience times where they feel lonely, and like their love has run its course. It is easy to let the stress of work, family and unexpected life events you affect you. Couples counseling gives couples the tools to improve communication, strengthen intimacy and deal with conflict. When you attend couples counseling with Transformation Counseling Services, we dig deep beneath the surface to uncover what has caused unhealthy communication. Our therapist specialize in working with all types of couples in every type of relationship. We work with LGBTQ+ couples as well as couples in non-traditional relationships. Please contact us for more info

Working with couples, married or not I will help you understand and resolve conflicts and improve your relationships. I will give you the tools to communicate better, negotiate differences, problem solve and even argue in a healthier way. I know the techniques that will help you reach the right pathway to happiness.

I can help you navigate understanding and recovery through infidelity, deceit, and betrayal and guide you on your path toward healing. We will work together to identify the problem behaviors and frameworks and map a path toward freedom from pain. It is possible to not only overcome this adversity but also to land in a stronger and better place than before. I am here and eager to provide a safe place to help you see healing and reconciliation.

Couples sometimes find that their relationships – once the source of so much intimacy and joy – have become disappointing, even destructive. We all reach impasses in our relationships, and these can be opportunities to overcome obstacles and grow together or to recognize irreconcilable differences and end the relationship in a healthy way. Together in therapy we can work to help you shift from criticizing and blaming to discovering individual feelings that underlie the surface conflicts. It can have a liberating and transformative effect on both you relationship and yourselves.