Great Couples Counseling in Elkton, MD. Therapy to heal relationships.

As a couples counselor I am on the side of the relationship. While I may spend some time focusing on one partner or the other in order to understand relational dynamics, my primary goal is to help the relationship. Each relationship is unique. Some issues that affect couples include trust building, healthy boundaries, open communication, individual and relational growth, transitional life stages, financial issues, decision making. We will identify the strengths and weakness of your specific relationship, explore what makes a successful relationship and suggest ways to improve your relationship.

We are meant to form connections that are safe and close and loving, but most couples at some time or another find themselves stuck in a repetitive pattern of interacting which leaves each person feeling hurt and alone. Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples, the most well-researched approach to couple therapy, is a powerful tool that will help get to the heart of the problem and to find your way back to that experience of loving connection. Interrupting that downward spiral feels like hard work for most couples, but beginning to move to a new, warm, close place, is immensely rewarding, even for those who have previously been distressed or shut down. I have great hope for couples!

The most important thing in couples therapy is helping both people learn what they can do differently to transform negative patterns into a mutually respectful, loving relationship. When people learn to really listen to each other, communication improves. Understanding and compassion take the place of anger and resentment, transforming power struggles into mutual support. What a relief! I specialize in helping couples move beyond the crisis of infidelity to create a relationship that's better and stronger than ever. When this happens, trust is rebuilt and both partners gain confidence that they will never again suffer the pain of an affair

Most if not every couple can find themselves in a place where they feel stuck and not sure how to move forward. Couples counseling can be a great option if you find yourself in this place. My approach involves understanding each individual's dilemma of the couple, identifying the areas that are making the couple feeling stuck, and helping them find a way forward.

I always prefer to see couples BEFORE they get married, because so many problems can be avoided by getting started out on the right foot. By learning good communication and problem solving skills before marriage, you can move on to that next step with confidence and skill. I also work with couples for whom marriage is not the goal, who are gay or lesbian, or couples who simply have reached an impasse on an issue and are looking for an objective third party.

There are two most basic fears of intimacy that we all have: one is fear of abandonment, the other is fear of being taken over, of losing my autonomy. In a relationship, people often become polarized with one clinging and the other seeming distant. With awareness of our fears and how to take care of ourselves and each other, we will bring out the best in each other. Everyone knows how to speak and listen, right? Not so. The most difficult skills to learn are to speak self-responsibly about your own experience and to truly listen and understand the other person's experience even when you don't like it. To learn these skills enables love. I can help.

Having a safe and open environment to address communication challenges, expressing vulnerability, and seeking the support to become accountable in your relationship is what couples counseling can offer. This process can help you and your partner gain greater stability and a deeper understanding of your relationship dynamic. I find that when I work with couple communication is a major issue. Therefore working with a counselor who can help you and your partner feel heard have the potential to open the door to getting certain needs in the relationship met and understood.

Couples therapy can be like inviting someone into your “home,” the special relational zone that you share with your significant other. Teletherapy can offer further enrichment to the therapeutic process, in addition to convenience factors. I strive to maintain a neutral and gentle perspective, helping you each observe and better manage your relational patterns of communion or disconnect. I can adapt my style to help you learn and practice new ways to empathize with your partner’s perspective, communicate effectively, resolve conflict and enjoy healthy connected-ness. I use tools such as the Myers-Briggs temperament styles, IMAGO techniques, and the Prepare-Enrich assessment survey.

I believe it is important for all couples to do marital check-ins with a therapist. If you are doing check-ins with your partner, you can gain insight into what they may be feeling internally. If you are struggling with trust and communication in your relationship, then therapy may help you with your struggle. It is important to seek a therapist that will help you as "one union" so you are not feeling like you are in the struggle alone. As a therapist working with couples it is important to acknowledge the myriad of emotions one may feel when they are not seeing eye to eye. Support is vital and a trusted therapist can help you navigate through these emotions.