Anger Management and Counseling in East Hampton, CT.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwaive optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

On a scale of 0-10 when you are at a 4, 5 or 6 you are angry, when you are at an 8, 9 or 10 you are in a rage. Rage occurs when one upsetting event piles onto another and another, and you never have time to fully heal from any of them. Rage comes up quicker, builds stronger and lasts longer; you say and do things that you would never imagine at any other time. You see red and don’t care about your reputation, the future, the consequences or what effect it is having on your family or career. We focus on helping you to fully resolve your rage at it's root so that you can start having just normal anger - that gets your point across but doesn't do damage - like everybody else.

Anger is said to be a secondary emotion and yet it is so prevalent in many of our lives. People struggling with Anger and the havoc that it causes in ones life can be destructive to an individual or family system. Individuals will look at the differences between rational and irrational thought. Identify for themselves what happens to their body that sends the message they are angry before doing something they regret. They will learn different coping strategies to manage the intensity of their emotions so that anger no longer rules their life.

Erupting and lashing out to relieve your pain creates disruption in your everyday life. While anger is a healthy emotion, lashing out and rage creates guilt and relationship destruction. In my 30+ years of clinical practice, I have provided my clients with a non-judgemental safe environment so together we can build a trust where they can be open and honest without embarrassment or shame. In letting down their defenses and acknowledging their behavior, my clients learn how to emotionally regulate their pain by taking ownership and removing themselves from the current situation, which gives them space to provide a more regulated and healthy response.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can be very beneficial for helping to control your anger through the use of relaxation techniques, stress-coping thoughts for anger, identifying and changing thought patterns and more. You will learn to be more aware of internal body cues and find healthier ways of releasing stress and tension that build up to trigger your anger.

There are many theories behind what makes people angry. Some people say that depression is anger turned inwards and others say that anger is an attempt to control someone else. What I truly care about with my clients is that they are simply able to identify when they are angry and how to respond accordingly. Typically the wiring inside of your head makes you react first and ask questions later. My job is for that gap (reaction and response time) to become shorter and shorter, and to help prevent these episodes from ever occurring

My therapy approach is well suited to anger management because all emotions begin with our thoughts. I will guide you to exprience your own insights about the nature of thought and how your thinking contributes to your expeience of frustration which ultimately leads to anger. I also provide a variety of resources for you so that you feel supported while you go through the process.

Because "lashing out" or difficulty managing anger can happen for many reasons, I tailor my approach to each person. I first try to understand why it is happening, and treat the underlying reasons. Some people have powerful emotions and need skills to manage them, others have a traumatic past that needs exploration, while others may have anxiety or depression and may feel extremely irritable, thus "snapping" at their loved ones.

I have over a decade of experience working with people who had anger issues. I find that the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) model of therapy to be highly effective at helping people to overcome their anger. Also, meditation can be tremendously helpful to some people, and I can help teach people Yan Xin Qigong, which I learned when I did my 1st degree at UCONN. I also like to consider family and relationship issues, which sometimes benefit very well from my marriage and family therapy training. I welcome people to contact me if they want to see me or get a referral. (Please check with your insurance for coverage of anger management, as some don't cover it, or not when court ordered).