Grief and Loss Counseling in Santa Barbara, CA.

Losing someone close to us can have a deep impact on how we act in the world and also how we enter relationships afterward. In working with grief, I gently support clients to express their feelings and also to transform them in a healthy way. Clients often find using mindfulness and expressive therapies such as drawing, metaphor, sand tray, and poetry helpful when grieving because they can help to regulate the emotional centers of the brain. Depending on the age of the client, I may discuss the stages of grief and support the healing elements of each stage. I will work with you or your child to find what is most supportive to moving forward.

Are you using alcohol, substances, or addictive behaviors to cope with grief and loss? Although they provide relief in the short term, their long-term effects on your relationships and health can make it even more difficult to cope. Through a compassionate non-judgmental approach, I help clients explore their relationship to grief and loss so that they can overcome addictive coping strategies. If you're looking for another way forward, feel free to reach out and we can set up a free consultation to discuss further.

Grief is natural. It is our human response to change or loss. It can be very painful. How the pain of grief moves through the body, mind, and soul is unique to each person. Sometimes we don't know why we feel empty, hurt, or sad. The process of gently exploring and sharing in a supportive environment helps us to really feel the feelings so they can pass through. We can then slowly begin to move forward again.

Grief can be a difficulty beast to manage, a beast which can surface at any moment without warning and often comes in waves. When I’ve been grieving I’ve felt like I was in an emotional pong ball. With the aid of tools like EMDR CBT and guided visualizations I can help you to heal and leave the pain, loss, and grief in the past while holding on to the happy memories. Additionally, I can provide tools, coping skills, and other resources to help you manage this particular issue.

When you lose something or someone important or close to you, it may be difficult to make sense of life or to feel that others can relate to or understand what you are going through. If you need someone to talk to about what happened, I am here for you. I understand that sadness is often something that shouldn't be fixed, but embraced. I also specialize in helping people who were hurt or abused by the deceased. Grief and Loss is a painful time of life, one that every human being goes through. You are not alone. I will come alongside you through the anger, loneliness, fear, shock, and panic. In the middle of the grief, the way forward can bring hope, strength, peace and freedom from guilt.

Grief and loss is a part of so much more than many recognize in every day life. Most folks are familiar with the Kubler-Ross stages, but processing grief is much more than those five stages. There are tasks of mourning that can be explored and expanded with support in therapy. There are secondary losses as a result of an initial loss. Grief impacts how open we feel to new relationships in our lives. I work with clients to help them understand their responses to grief, move through their grief and feelings through expressive arts and verbal processing.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you don’t include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Grief and loss comes in many shapes and forms and can take a toll on various aspects of your life. Processing grief and loss takes time and is different for everyone but doesn’t have to be done alone. I will offer support, empathy, and a safe space for you to process your emotions openly. Together we will get through this difficult time in your life. You are not alone.

Grief and loss effects all of us to a greater or lesser extent at some point in our lives. I wholeheartedly believe in the importance of the grieving process, and never rush my clients through it. When we grieve our losses we honor them. I often use EMDR to facilitate the grieving, and also use the Kubler-Ross stages of grief to help the client understand what he or she is going through. Clients come out of their grieving process not only with a greater understanding of their loss, but also of themselves.