Family Counseling Services in Winton, CA.

I believe that as we grow up we are shaped by our relationships; this starts from the time we are little and continues for the rest of our lives. Through these relationships we are also shaped by society. In being shaped we create various meaning from our experiences as well as receiving and giving instructions on how to live. When we form new relationships of any kind, this gets challenged; coming together and finding a path forward that celebrates all involved is the key to success.

Family relationships can be stressful and challenging. There may be anger, arguments, grief & loss, mental or physical illness, unresolved trauma, abuse, neglect, betrayal, financial or occupational challenges that create distress in the family system. Healthy family members have open, honest and compassionate communication. They hear, know and understand each other. They take responsibility and are accountable for their impact on each other. They show love and care through affection, attention, appreciation, being of service, spending quality time with and being there for each other. I guide you in developing the skills, qualities and habits needed to get your family to a better place!

When working with children and youth, the therapist cannot ignore the family system in which the child lives. I work with parents in multiple ways to help support youth in treatment, which may include separate parent sessions, co-parenting sessions, systemic family therapy, or Filial Therapy, a play therapy practice that coaches and guides parents in special play sessions with their child to decrease unwanted behaviors, improve relationships and communication, increase the child's emotional vocabulary, and increase the child's self-esteem.

Imagine a family as a tree with branches, roots, trunk representing parts of the immediate and extended family. When working with families, all elements are considered. Usually there is a request for family therapy due to one of it's members in crisis, often a child. However, when an analysis of need is done it becomes apparent that more than one member of the family needs help in adjusting, growing and learning new behaviours. Clients contact me for a variety of reasons: to improve communications, solve family problems, support in special situations such as death, divorce, marriage, illness, child or adolescent issues.

Said one grieving mother, "Being estranged from your children and grandchildren is harder than surviving suicide. It's like experiencing a funeral, but they are not dead." Said another, "Many of my friends are excitedly anticipating visits from their relatives. They are shopping for them, planning meals and activities. I am truly happy for them. I want the same for myself, but I can't have it..." I work with parents and their adult children who have become estranged. My goal is to bring about reconciliation. If you have a need in this area, please feel free to call me to discuss your situation.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently deregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dysfunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.