Family Counseling Services in San Francisco, CA.

I spent two years running the adolescent unit of a psychiatric hospital, where I had to do a great many family therapy sessions, which has made me very experienced in family dynamics. I am a big believer in the family systems approach, where the family is seen as a relational unit and focus is put on how the energetics are playing out in the family dynamic.

I work within a family framework, but I do not treat families as part of traditional "family therapy." This means that if you are a parent and you struggle with your child's behavior, I can help you learn techniques to manage the behavior better. I have extensive experience working with parents of children with autism and other mental health disorders that can make parenting extremely challenging. There is no shame in asking for support. I can help with creating a parenting plan, I can help with co-parenting after divorce, and I can help parents who care for their own aging relatives. We truly live in the "sandwich generation" where family can grow far.

When working with children and youth, the therapist cannot ignore the family system in which the child lives. I work with parents in multiple ways to help support youth in treatment, which may include separate parent sessions, co-parenting sessions, systemic family therapy, or Filial Therapy, a play therapy practice that coaches and guides parents in special play sessions with their child to decrease unwanted behaviors, improve relationships and communication, increase the child's emotional vocabulary, and increase the child's self-esteem.

Said one grieving mother, "Being estranged from your children and grandchildren is harder than surviving suicide. It's like experiencing a funeral, but they are not dead." Said another, "Many of my friends are excitedly anticipating visits from their relatives. They are shopping for them, planning meals and activities. I am truly happy for them. I want the same for myself, but I can't have it..." I work with parents and their adult children who have become estranged. My goal is to bring about reconciliation. If you have a need in this area, please feel free to call me to discuss your situation.

I specialize in helping families find harmony within the home. I have extensive experience working with individuals, couples, families, and children of all ages. Whether you are dealing with a family conflict, a difficult transition, or a new challenge, I am here to help. My practice focuses on providing a safe and supportive environment for all family members. I will work with you to identify the underlying causes of the conflict and develop strategies for improving family relationships. I believe that all family dynamics are unique and strive to provide each family with the attention and care they need.

The most frequent family issues I see are problems with parenting (agreeing on limits/ consequences, either parent feeling supported by the other), difficulty with issues of adolescence (self-injury, eating disorder, suicidality, substance abuse, abusive relationships, bullying), and arguing/ yelling at one another. Any of these issues are difficult to handle; often times they occur as a bundle of issues. This can feel overwhelming to both parent and child. The whole system suffers and feelings of fear, hopelessness, guilt, anger, and resentment are free-floating with no useful direction. We will find strategies that work for your family so that you enjoy one another again.

I use a family systems approach in my therapy, so having family members in the room, in my opinion, is the most efficient route towards healing and growth in individuals. I encourage clients to address relationships that are causing distress in their lives and work towards healthy differentiation of self. This can be done in individual therapy as well, but is more effective when all members of the relationship are present.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently deregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dysfunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Families are hard. They can be full of love, but they are also full of frustration, disappointment, bitterness, and resentment. The love in a family can often hold people through these challenging emotions, but what happens when communication breaks down? Therapy helps to slow things down and translate some of the more overwhelming or unclear communications so that your family can move forward together.