Family Counseling Services in Phelan, CA.

I specialize in online parent coaching with the goal of helping you and your family have a closer more intimate relationship. After 11 years of working with children and families, I have concluded that this is the most effective way I can support families because you parents are the leaders of your home. If I can empower you through my knowledge and experience to implement some strategies at home, you can achieve your goals for your family. The support I provide will be sufficient for many families, but there are some situations that could benefit from the in-vivo coaching and direction that in person family therapy provides. Call me for a free 15 minute consultation about your needs

I offer a balanced approach which gives a voice to each member of your family unit. Validating individual concerns while promoting inter-familial harmony is my specialty when it comes to counseling troubled families. I will teach you and your family how to communicate in productive ways, how to set healthy boundaries with one another and how to respect your differences in an atmosphere of love and understanding.

Family relationships can be stressful and challenging. There may be anger, arguments, grief & loss, mental or physical illness, unresolved trauma, abuse, neglect, betrayal, financial or occupational challenges that create distress in the family system. Healthy family members have open, honest and compassionate communication. They hear, know and understand each other. They take responsibility and are accountable for their impact on each other. They show love and care through affection, attention, appreciation, being of service, spending quality time with and being there for each other. I guide you in developing the skills, qualities and habits needed to get your family to a better place!

Family therapy sessions aim to strengthen all members of the family so they can work out problems together. Often, if one family member is identified as having an illness, the cause can be traced back to a larger family problem. If the person with the illness is treated while the rest of the family does not change, then the symptoms will persist. Family therapy breaks these cycles by teaching everyone to better interact with one another.

Imagine a family as a tree with branches, roots, trunk representing parts of the immediate and extended family. When working with families, all elements are considered. Usually there is a request for family therapy due to one of it's members in crisis, often a child. However, when an analysis of need is done it becomes apparent that more than one member of the family needs help in adjusting, growing and learning new behaviours. Clients contact me for a variety of reasons: to improve communications, solve family problems, support in special situations such as death, divorce, marriage, illness, child or adolescent issues.

Said one grieving mother, "Being estranged from your children and grandchildren is harder than surviving suicide. It's like experiencing a funeral, but they are not dead." Said another, "Many of my friends are excitedly anticipating visits from their relatives. They are shopping for them, planning meals and activities. I am truly happy for them. I want the same for myself, but I can't have it..." I work with parents and their adult children who have become estranged. My goal is to bring about reconciliation. If you have a need in this area, please feel free to call me to discuss your situation.

In today’s culture, having children derived from more than one relationship is common. Divorce and remarriage can lead to a complex view of what is family. With these complexities come pressure, confusion, frustration, anxiety, and depression. These emotions can be experienced by any part of the family; the children, the father(s), or the mother(s) or even with extended family like the grandparents. Often these emotions are advanced as the lines of connection and boundaries are blurred or misunderstood. Counseling can help you to discover the importance of boundaries, understand the need for healthy relationships, and find balance.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently deregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dysfunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Communication, joy, happiness, togetherness, trust, respect, faithfulness, honesty. These are the things we all want and expect in our relationships. Unfortunately, your once happy family is now struggling just to stay together. You don’t talk, spend time together, pray with or for one another… You live separate lives of strangers. You fight, argue and sometimes avoid one another on purpose. You hope and pray every day that today will be the day that God heals your family, brings you closer together and turns all the pain and frustration back into joy and laughter. Let us help you find your way back together and restore/heal whatever is keeping you apart.

Let me guess. One partner feels alone and like they don't matter and the other feels they are always being criticized and can't get anything right. The more one asks for the other to show up, the more the partner disappears physically and emotionally. You both bicker and fight and the idea of sitting and just hanging out seems elusive, if not impossible. Something like this? Often we crave connection but are blocked by the pain and the history that gets in the way. Small fights about little things become battles that highlight our struggle to have our basic relational needs met. I can help you get under the bickering to the parts crying out for connection- to an enriching relationship.