Family Counseling Services in Montclair, CA.

Often times we don't realize the impact our birth families have on how we function on a day to day basis and the difficulties we face. Take this opportunity to explore the dynamics of your childhood, learn how your relationships with immediate and extended family members has impacted your approach to current relationships, work, changes in life and potential stressors.

Imagine a family as a tree with branches, roots, trunk representing parts of the immediate and extended family. When working with families, all elements are considered. Usually there is a request for family therapy due to one of it's members in crisis, often a child. However, when an analysis of need is done it becomes apparent that more than one member of the family needs help in adjusting, growing and learning new behaviours. Clients contact me for a variety of reasons: to improve communications, solve family problems, support in special situations such as death, divorce, marriage, illness, child or adolescent issues.

Sometimes family members just can't seem to get along. Parents and children may experience a heightened amount of conflict turning the teen years; one parent may be too enmeshed with the kids, leaving the other one out; brothers and sisters may fight; new families don't blend as expected. Whatever the issue, family counseling can surely help. I will meet you all and examine each persons ability to solve problems and express thoughts and emotions. Together, we will work towards identifying the family's strengths and weaknesses in effort to overcome unhealthy ways of relating to each other. We will work towards improving communication and resolving conflicts in effort to bring you closer.

Let me guess. One partner feels alone and like they don't matter and the other feels they are always being criticized and can't get anything right. The more one asks for the other to show up, the more the partner disappears physically and emotionally. You both bicker and fight and the idea of sitting and just hanging out seems elusive, if not impossible. Something like this? Often we crave connection but are blocked by the pain and the history that gets in the way. Small fights about little things become battles that highlight our struggle to have our basic relational needs met. I can help you get under the bickering to the parts crying out for connection- to an enriching relationship.

Are you having issues with a spouse, child, or relative? Do you feel like you can't communicate? Do you feel mistreated? Differences will always exit, but can be dealt with. You're not alone! We create a custom made system that fits your life to bring the greatest results.Call us now to see how we can help you repair your relationship and live happy.

Families engaging in therapy with me will find a compassionate and strong leader who understands the profound stress that family conflicts and perpetual problems can create. My approach is centered on guiding families through their tensions and difficulties, providing a structured and supportive environment where each member feels heard and valued. By focusing on your family's unique dynamics and challenges, I facilitate open communication and collaboration, leading to practical and lasting solutions. Clients will leave with a renewed sense of connection and the tools to foster a more harmonious family life, turning seemingly insurmountable problems into opportunities for growth.

Each member of your family has an important role that affects how your family functions. Sometimes it seems that even one person can cause most of the problems that a family experiences. Other families it may be hard to identify the cause of stress. In any case family issues can affect each individual in a powerful way causing anxiety, feelings of powerlessness, frustration and even hopelessness. Counseling can get at the root of the probllem(s) and provide affective strategies that will help your family communicate better, support and even appreciate each other more!

When working with children and youth, the therapist cannot ignore the family system in which the child lives. I work with parents in multiple ways to help support youth in treatment, which may include separate parent sessions, co-parenting sessions, systemic family therapy, or Filial Therapy, a play therapy practice that coaches and guides parents in special play sessions with their child to decrease unwanted behaviors, improve relationships and communication, increase the child's emotional vocabulary, and increase the child's self-esteem.

In today’s culture, having children derived from more than one relationship is common. Divorce and remarriage can lead to a complex view of what is family. With these complexities come pressure, confusion, frustration, anxiety, and depression. These emotions can be experienced by any part of the family; the children, the father(s), or the mother(s) or even with extended family like the grandparents. Often these emotions are advanced as the lines of connection and boundaries are blurred or misunderstood. Counseling can help you to discover the importance of boundaries, understand the need for healthy relationships, and find balance.

Families are the places where we should find the love and support to face the world and all its challenges. However, sometimes families loose their way due to poor communication and misunderstandings , anger, acting out behaviors, hurt feelings and lack of knowledge. Maya Angelou has said: "People do what they know; when they know better, they do better." My plan for families is to help them know better so they can do better. Where there is loving-kindness and a will to make change the future seems brighter.

Family therapy sessions aim to strengthen all members of the family so they can work out problems together. Often, if one family member is identified as having an illness, the cause can be traced back to a larger family problem. If the person with the illness is treated while the rest of the family does not change, then the symptoms will persist. Family therapy breaks these cycles by teaching everyone to better interact with one another.

Family counseling is helpful with problems setting limits with children, dealing with grief, divorce, loss that can cause behavior problems, school issues, or family problems. Sometimes parents want help with boundaries for teenagers with anger issues, reblelliousness or entitlement problems. In some cases family therapy involves young adults who need support building an indepentent lifestyle and recovery from drugs or alcohol. Family therapy helps you learn how to help without enabling!

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently deregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dysfunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.