Great Couples Counseling in Charter Oak, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Is your relationship in need of healing and strengthening for increased connection? Are you not even sure you want to be in the relationship and need a safe space to explore it? I'm a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and a certified Prepare-Enrich Couples Counselor and offer professional couples counseling, premarital counseling, and marital couples counseling. I utilize effective communication skills, Attachment Theory, Family Systems, and Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy to help restore your emotional bond and intimacy. Take the first step towards a fulfilling and lasting relationship and I look forward to working together with you!

The general goal is to reduce conflict and increase intimacy. In the safety of therapy, and with a trained professional as a third party, you each will have the opportunity to learn about yourself in depth, in addition to gaining insights into the complex dynamics of your relationship. The increasing of knowledge, communication skills, and relational tools can combine to create the intimacy and connection that is so necessary in marriage.

Couples counseling is some of the most rewarding work a Marriage/Couples counselor can do, we love to help restore broken or just wounded relationships. Sometimes the brokenness gets so bad that people start thinking of separating or divorcing. Often people think that once they separate or divorce that they will not have to put up with each other again. This may be true if you don’t have children. However, if you have children you will still have to navigate the process of getting along even after you have separated. The issues don’t go away. As a licensed Marriage and Family therapist I can help you separate out the pitfalls of separation or divorce realistically.

I see clients in relationships of all kinds. Whether you are in a poly relationship, you practice non-monogamy, or if you are in a traditional marriage, you are in the right place. I offer a non-judgmental space where we work as a team to improve communication, develop connection and understanding, and use real tools to better your relationship. I am more than a mediator-- I help each person communicate their true thoughts and true needs without conflict. Do you have intimacy issues and need sex therapy? I provide that service as well. Sex is part of every relationship and should always be a priority. Physical intimacy is vital and I can help you make improvements that stick over time.

Your primary relationship should be a "recharging station" to recover from the stresses of everyday life. When your relationship is the SOURCE of your stress, it can be an overwhelming problem. Oftentimes, the stress leads to angry outbursts, addictive behaviors, dishonesty, and even infidelity. The good news is, that if the partners are motivated, amazing progress can be made. Our first task is to reduce tension so communication and trust can be restored. I provide objectivity in a balanced atmosphere. And trust me, over the course of my career working with couples, I've heard everything - your problems are probably more common than you think. You CAN overcome them!

Affordable couples workshops are offered once a month! Couples want to raise their relationship to a HIGHER LEVEL OF LOVE! Today there are tools to guide couples to improve communication, learn how to be a team, resolve problems without escalating, and regain their sexual desire, attraction and passion, when they both feel heard, supported and close. When relationships become stuck at a lower level of love couples lost desire and attraction, can't communicate with depth, and feel like adversaries on opposite teams! We build our whole lives on love, why settle! Dr. Wheeler has written several books (on amazon) that teach couples tools for heart-centered love!

Our staff of over 25 therapists specializes in helping couples in distress. From pre-marital counseling to couples work and even marriages that have been together for years--we are ready to help. Our staff has received training from Dr. Susan Johnson, the international expert on marriage and couples therapy and can help couples get free from patterns of fighting that you can't get out of on your own. We can teach you how to get free from the gridlock of fruitless fighting, and learn how to thrive in your relationship again.

When two individuals desire to be together due to the mutual love they feel for one another and encounter difficulties within the relationship seeking therapy is vital. Each couple has specific relationship need and goals. Learning the partners love language, relationship goals and assisting them with communication skills can be crucial in providing longevity to the relationship.

My style with relationships is empathetic, compassionate, and direct. Over the years, individuals fall into patterns and become accustomed to relating ways that may or may not be working. My job is to identify goals, illuminate those patterns, and discuss new ways of relating. Communication, Intimacy, Trust, Respect, and Life Transitions impact relationships. As we grow, who we are changes. Does your partner know who you are, what you truly want, and the spark that makes you... you? My goal is to rekindle pieces of the relationship that may be lost and move the relationship forward in the direction you choose. I work with couples ranging from high conflict to couples looking for a refresh.

I believe that good relationships are built on secure attachments, ones that are engaged and emotionally responsive to one another. In my experience working with couples, and research supports this idea as well, a combination of strategies that teach them to be more accepting of each other while at the same time working to change some of their assumptions and automatic behaviors are at the root of change. I see this in my private practice with partners attacking, often forgetting what brought them together in the first place; I guide them back into each other's arms, and back into a safety zone with a combination of attachment and communication techniques that have shown to be effective.

In couples counseling we will explore the strengths each of you brings to your relationship and how these contribute to the overall health of your relationship together. We will work to understand your contributions and barriers to making your relationship work. The focus will remain on your goals for the relationship with the understanding that these may change as we learn more about each parties level of contribution. I encourage honesty between both parties. You will be encouraged to speak directly with one another to work toward strengthening your communication skills by clarifying the meaning and quality of the words you choose when speaking with your partner.

Couples counseling is a wonderful opportunity to truly connect. Learning new ways of bonding with our partners is much easier than you may think and I believe it is truly a must in any relationship. I don't want to force partners in but rather encourage them to see the potential that exists within your relationship. My reality over the years is that you are going to get stuck at some point. That's ok. We just need to help you through it. Individual needs cannot be sacrificed and truly do not have to be. Let's see what we can do together.

For COUPLES THERAPY THAT WORKS, choose a COUPLES THERAPIST - I am trained in evidence based EFT & powerful couples modalities such as PACT & NVC. AND I teach you an entire COUPLES COURSE as we do therapy. Learn about neuroscience, trauma, communication, attachment & more. Often one person feels unsupported & unimportant & “pursues” the other for communication & connection, while the other feels like they’re never enough, can’t please their partner & usually withdraws & shuts down. Break this painful cycle & take your relationship to the next level - Create a safe haven & secure bond with a true experience of partnership. Feel seen, heard & that YOU MATTER! Develop a WE not just ME mindset.