Great Couples Counseling in Avocado Heights, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

I specialize in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a a highly effective method for healing relationships. Research has shown that 70-75% of couples who participate in EFT become closer and more intimate in their relationship, and 90% show significant improvements. As a trained EFT therapist, I am more interested in exploring the patterns and cycles that you get stuck in when facing conflict. How do you handle conflict? Do you become angry and lash out with your words, or do you shut down and tune out (or leave). How does your partner respond to you during these times? It is the dance between you that I am interested in exploring. Once we identify the dance, then we can work at change.

The main thing I notice couples coming in for is to work on trust issues, communication problems, and lack of intimacy within the relationship. This can manifest into anger, affairs, shutting down, and a number of other behaviors. I work with couples FIRST on what does work, so that they can build upon skills they already possess within their relationship. 2: Teaching basic listening skills so that partners feel heard. 3: Teaching the couples how to communicate without attacking. 4: implementing those skills at home. Therapy is much more complex than this, and there are many more aspects of communication, but building strengths is very important to relationship success.

Loving, successful relationships need to be carefully and skillfully nurtured in the following five areas: Emotional, Intellectual, Spiritual, Sexual, Financial. Couples who are ready to do ongoing work on their relationships are richly rewarded with a loving, meaningful and joyful life together. Committed relationships that have the possibility of morphing into long term relationships benefit greatly by being guided by the Gottman research on relationships as well as Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Premarital Counselling prepares a couple for a new stage in their relationship by identifying potential areas of conflict and strength and developing tools to create a strong foundation.

My style with relationships is empathetic, compassionate, and direct. Over the years, individuals fall into patterns and become accustomed to relating ways that may or may not be working. My job is to identify goals, illuminate those patterns, and discuss new ways of relating. Communication, Intimacy, Trust, Respect, and Life Transitions impact relationships. As we grow, who we are changes. Does your partner know who you are, what you truly want, and the spark that makes you... you? My goal is to rekindle pieces of the relationship that may be lost and move the relationship forward in the direction you choose. I work with couples ranging from high conflict to couples looking for a refresh.

I specialize in couples and marriage counseling. My approach is based on recent research in marriage science showing what habits successful couples have that other do not. My approach is skills based and practical, teaching both of you how to communicate more effectively, how to understand each other, how to decide what is changeable and what is not in your relationship, how to deal with perpetual issues,on which you may be deadlocked, and different ways to view issues and problems in your relationship to reduce conflict. I also help you identify what is working in your relationship, (or what used to work) so that we can build on the positive.

Relationships are the stuff of life and wise persons will attend carefully to their intimate, committed relationship. Most couples are not aware of the sources of conflict and how these sources impact their relationships. Most couples do not understand how their coping habits, learned the child and teen years, will actually interfere with success in their love relationship. Couples all need to learn new and better ways to cope with relationships pain as their old coping habits will not work -- they will end up unintentionally hurting their partner.

Couples counseling is some of the most rewarding work a Marriage/Couples counselor can do, we love to help restore broken or just wounded relationships. Sometimes the brokenness gets so bad that people start thinking of separating or divorcing. Often people think that once they separate or divorce that they will not have to put up with each other again. This may be true if you don’t have children. However, if you have children you will still have to navigate the process of getting along even after you have separated. The issues don’t go away. As a licensed Marriage and Family therapist I can help you separate out the pitfalls of separation or divorce realistically.

Couples' therapy is a particular love of mine. The bond between intimate partners is compelling, powerful and hard-wired for us mammals, and the pain of missing our connections with one another is deep. Together, we can discover the patterns that don't work, and then join to find ways to reach out and respond to one another that bring security and joy.

Our staff of over 25 therapists specializes in helping couples in distress. From pre-marital counseling to couples work and even marriages that have been together for years--we are ready to help. Our staff has received training from Dr. Susan Johnson, the international expert on marriage and couples therapy and can help couples get free from patterns of fighting that you can't get out of on your own. We can teach you how to get free from the gridlock of fruitless fighting, and learn how to thrive in your relationship again.

The general goal is to reduce conflict and increase intimacy. In the safety of therapy, and with a trained professional as a third party, you each will have the opportunity to learn about yourself in depth, in addition to gaining insights into the complex dynamics of your relationship. The increasing of knowledge, communication skills, and relational tools can combine to create the intimacy and connection that is so necessary in marriage.

Couples come into counseling for various problems. Couples therapy can be very helpful to identify negative patterns of behavior which cause unhappiness, it also can point our strengths in the relationship which are causing a great deal of satisfaction in the relationship. I work from a Christian based Gottman model to help couples to quickly determine what is going wrong for them and help them to solve these issues and have the happy relationship they desire.

I have worked with hundred's of couples over the last 20 years. Each couple is unique in their own right which means there is no one way to "fix" a problem. Our deepest longings and hopes emerge in a couples relationship. Oftentimes we are working out unmet needs and hopes carried forward from our early family relationships to our present couple relationship. Problems become increasingly complex and difficult to overcome when we don't know what these issues are all about. Couples remain stuck in conflict not because of what they know, but what they don't know or can't recognize. The work in therapy is to help couples recognize unhealthy patterns of relating and introduce novelty.

Couple relationships are the source of our greatest joy, fulfillment, frustration, fear, and hopes. When they go well, there is nothing better. When the go wrong they are the source of intense emotional pain. Did you know that there is significant, reliable research that informs what builds and what can unravel even the most loving relationships? We have this knowledge and can share it with you in a safe, caring, and confidential environment. It is possible to make your good relationship great and your hurting relationship whole again.

Couples have come to see me for a variety of reasons throughout the years, but I find that no matter what the presenting problem may be, being able to effectively communicate with each other is vital to restoring the relationship. Often couples have a completely different style of relating to one another and resolving conflict. I work with couples to better understand their partner and I help each person to communicate in a way that they can finally be heard. It doesn’t matter what you are fighting about if the other person can’t hear what you are saying. Call 714-751-0888 so I can help you express yourself more effectively so you can stop the fighting and start the healing process.

I believe that good relationships are built on secure attachments, ones that are engaged and emotionally responsive to one another. In my experience working with couples, and research supports this idea as well, a combination of strategies that teach them to be more accepting of each other while at the same time working to change some of their assumptions and automatic behaviors are at the root of change. I see this in my private practice with partners attacking, often forgetting what brought them together in the first place; I guide them back into each other's arms, and back into a safety zone with a combination of attachment and communication techniques that have shown to be effective.

Is this you? All we do is fight! It seems like we never hear each other and neither of us listens anymore! It is so frustrating I do not want to come home and try. I have been successfully helping couples to develop the tools necessary to communicate effectively for more than 20 years. Having disagreements is not unusual. Learning how to resolve disagreements is a key element to healthy relationships. Conflict resolution is about learning to fight fairly by listening in an atmosphere of Respect, Trust, Safety and love and not placing my desire to be right over the relationship.

Couples counseling is a wonderful opportunity to truly connect. Learning new ways of bonding with our partners is much easier than you may think and I believe it is truly a must in any relationship. I don't want to force partners in but rather encourage them to see the potential that exists within your relationship. My reality over the years is that you are going to get stuck at some point. That's ok. We just need to help you through it. Individual needs cannot be sacrificed and truly do not have to be. Let's see what we can do together.

In couples counseling we will explore the strengths each of you brings to your relationship and how these contribute to the overall health of your relationship together. We will work to understand your contributions and barriers to making your relationship work. The focus will remain on your goals for the relationship with the understanding that these may change as we learn more about each parties level of contribution. I encourage honesty between both parties. You will be encouraged to speak directly with one another to work toward strengthening your communication skills by clarifying the meaning and quality of the words you choose when speaking with your partner.

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

Over the years, the couples change. The spark, the feeling you have around each other--it changes. Every couple is different, but simply put, I help couples experience more connection and meaning in their relationships. Together with your partner I will help you navigate conflict, communicate in a deeper way, build connection (emotionally, spiritually, and sexually). I work with the couples ranging from never having been in therapist's office to couples who have "done couples therapy before", wherever you find yourselves--I'm here to help. Contact me today and let's see how we can get you and your relationship to a better place.

Most couples come in seeking better communication. I will work with you to communicate effectively and in a manner that is respectful and compassionate in regards to your significant other's own story. Together we will look at your style of connecting or not connecting with one another and work to increase connection. I also work successfully with many couples who experience infidelity and are seeking to re-build their relationship. Pre-marital counseling is available for couples who are thinking of marrying or on their way to the altar.

Dr. Eris Huemer is the author of "Break-Up Emergency. A Guide to Transform Your Break UP into a Break THROUGH" and a media consultant for various national television networks. Dr. Eris holds a doctorate degree in marriage and family therapy She guides people toward making positive & lasting life changes and helps them create relationships that they want and deserve. Dr. Eris helps people bring their Sexy Back in relationships while helping individuals and couples reinvent themselves from the inside out. She has helped many coulples "save" their relationship when they thought it was over or on the brink of divorce.

Couples counseling will provide the opportunity for couples to focus on their marriage by doing deeper work in a safe and confidential setting. Couples will explore and understand effective communication, love styles and form a deeper connection and intimacy. Couples counseling is available for any two people in a committed relationship. It is a great investment in any meaningful relationship!

In a relationship that you feel is stuck where neither partner feels loved, heard, or validated? I can work with you to change unhealthy patterns, learn new ways of communicating, and build a loving relationship. We will work together to create a new relationship vision for the future, a shared vision. I want to help you find the love you want and deserve.