![Peter Bernhardt, MFT](https://www.theravive.com/images/counsellors/peter-bernhardt.jpg)
Couples Counselor
Peter Bernhardt, MFT
Marriage Family Therapist
1197 Valencia, San Francisco, California 94110 | 510-684-0658
Are you trapped in destructive cycles of anger and blame? Have you lost trust because of an affair? Are you avoiding your partner or feeling disengaged? Is it hard for you to have real conversations or solve problems together? I will help you untangle your painful negative cycles of communication and build new stronger connections. You can learn to have power over that cycle by learning your triggers and undoing them. You will learn about the roots of the cycle learned in early relationships. Call, text or email me to set an appointment.
![Philip Starkman, MSW, RSW](https://www.theravive.com/images/counsellors/philip-starkman.jpg)
Couples Counselor
Philip Starkman, MSW, RSW
Registered Psychotherapist
Available for Online Therapy
Loving, successful relationships need to be carefully and skillfully nurtured in the following five areas: Emotional, Intellectual, Spiritual, Sexual, Financial. Couples who are ready to do ongoing work on their relationships are richly rewarded with a loving, meaningful and joyful life together. Committed relationships that have the possibility of morphing into long term relationships benefit greatly by being guided by the Gottman research on relationships as well as Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Premarital Counselling prepares a couple for a new stage in their relationship by identifying potential areas of conflict and strength and developing tools to create a strong foundation.
![Well Coached Life, PhD, MA, SEP](https://www.theravive.com/images/counsellors/well-coached-life.jpg)
Couples Counselor
Well Coached Life, PhD, MA, SEP
WELL COACHED LIFE| Individuals | Couples | Youth
Available for Online Therapy
Let me guess. One partner feels alone and like they don't matter and the other feels they are always being criticized and can't get anything right. The more one asks for the other to show up, the more the partner disappears physically and emotionally. You both bicker and fight and the idea of sitting and just hanging out seems elusive, if not impossible. Something like this? Often we crave connection but are blocked by the pain and the history that gets in the way. Small fights about little things become battles that highlight our struggle to have our basic relational needs met. I can help you get under the bickering to the parts crying out for connection- to an enriching relationship.
![Brian Jones, LMFT](https://www.theravive.com/images/counsellors/brian-jones.jpg)
Couples Counselor
Brian Jones, LMFT
Brian La Roy Jones, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist
Available for Online Therapy
Discover how you can go from rejected to connected! Did you know the reactivity you experience is not your fault? (This is one of the main things that causes fights and arguments. It's when you feel out of control, & it leads to doing or saying things you regret, impulsivity, & leads to hurt & separation). I show couples how they can reduce the personal & relational reactivity they experience & increase feeling peaceful, calm, understood, validated, safe, accepted, & connected. I help couples discover their attachment strategies (how we feel safe & get our needs met). This is necessary in order to create lasting improvement, safety, trust, understanding, & connection, in your relationship.
![John Kane, LMFT](https://www.theravive.com/images/counsellors/john-kane.jpg)
Couples Counselor
John Kane, LMFT
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Available for Online Therapy
Without conflict, couples do not achieve intimacy. The challenge is helping you and your partner learn how to have healthy conflict that leads to intimacy, rather than destructive conflict that destroys the relationship. I specialize in working with affairs and broken trust, abgtneuro-diverse couples. I usually start with helping you learn ground rules for being able to have safe, constructive, healthy conflict to reduce and eliminate destructive relational patterns. I also use Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT) to help you reconnect, learn healthy communication skills, rekindle the flame that you once had, and start talking to each other again. If you are willing to work, I am here for you
![Christi Lindsay, PsyD](https://www.theravive.com/images/counsellors/christi-lindsay.jpg)
Couples Counselor
Christi Lindsay, PsyD
Licensed Clinical Psychologist
Available for Online Therapy
Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.