Anger Management and Counseling in Yountville, CA.

Clients seeking better anger management benefit from working with me in many ways. They often benefit from learning how to recognize their early warning physical signs in their bodies that let them know they are beginning to feel anger. Once they become familiar with their own unique signs of beginning and increasing anger, they learn how to take appropriate action to calm themselves. This often means briefly removing themselves from the stressful situation that is triggering their anger. Then they learn how to calm themselves in whatever appropriate ways work for them.

Anger is one of our fundamental emotions, part of the basic machinery of our mind and personality. In some ways it is a useful tool that helps to motivate and energize us in seeking fairness and justice in the world around us. But this powerful hold-over from our primal history can also be enormously destructive if we lose control of it. If your anger is slipping out of your control and you find yourself saying or doing things that damage your reputation or your relationships, hurt those around you, or otherwise consistently put you on the outside of society's expectations for behavior, you need help to find tools or strategies to change this and I would be happy to help.

For most of us, on occasion, anger can be far out of proportion to the event that triggers it, and for some of us, it is a recurring problem that interferes with our work and our most important relationships. I help people with practical strategies to avoid immediate damage from uncontrolled anger, and I help them to understand their anger more fully and make more effective choices for themselves and others.

I aim to help my clients gain a better understanding of their emotions and how to manage them. My practice specializes in anger management and provides tools and techniques to help people maintain stable emotions, stronger relationships, and better communication. I also offer psychoanalytically informed counseling, which helps clients gain insight into their unconscious thoughts and behavior. With my understanding of the human mind, I am able to provide my clients with the support they need to make positive changes in their lives.

I help people struggling with anger management by working with them to develop awareness of their anger experience in their body and mind and how it is impacting their body. I help you learn and practice strategies for regulating your body and mind so you do not lose control of the anger. I help you to learn healthy communication of anger, and the development of conflict resolution skills. I support you in exploring issues of transference from past relationships and experiences that may be contributing to your strong feelings of anger in present circumstances and relationships. We create safety, increase positive expression of anger, and reduce or eliminate sources of anger when possible!

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Volatile, out-of-control anger can destroy so much of what you love. The necessary first step with destructive anger is to become sensitive to when and how it arises which allows you to employ well-practiced self-regulation strategies to divert the destructive explosion. My therapeutic domain is to help you with the equally necessary second step of anger work. The only way that you can ultimately resolve the anger problem in your life is to go to the hurt underneath the anger, which is the root cause. I provide a safe container and steady, empathic guidance as we move together to experience the depth and the texture of rich emotional energy that has been mis-directed through angry explosion.

Anger is a basic or primal emotion that is closley linked to the fight or flight response. So at its best, anger is there to protect you or a loved one. However, when anger is triggerred to easily, erupts inapropriatley, affects important personal or occupational relationships, then it is time to learn a new way of addressing your anger. I can help you learn better ways of communicating when you are angry that do not lead to destructive outbursts. I can also help you look underneath the anger to other issues and feelings that may be present. Some people get angry because it is a familiar feeling when really they are feelilng scared or sad. I can help you identify underling issues.

One of the most misunderstood aspects of chronic anger is that it is actually a secondary emotion. Underneath chronic anger is pain from a core wound such as physical or emotional trauma or the victim- persecutor pattern. I will guide you to identify your core wounds and work on healing your inner child while also providing you with tools and outlets to help you control anger reactions with others. You will learn mindfulness practices such as cultivating a relationship with your Higher self, somatic practices breath work practices , as well as communication tools. I also incorporate radical forgiveness work, which is a game changer when it comes to healing anger issues.

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.

Clients with anger issues can benefit from working with a therapist who is experienced at helping you learn how to manage your strong feelings more effectively and how to communicate with those around you more effectively, so that you are not so triggered to lose your temper as easily. Clients will frequently find that the time they are remaining angry decreases as they do the work. So, initially someone may stay angry for 3 days at a time. Over time with practice one may find themselves staying angry only for two days, then one day. Learning to manage your anger feels empowering. Learning to communicate helps reduce frustration and increases the experience of connection with others.

i have extensive experience in this area, having worked with Severely Disturbed Children for five years in a special school setting, and then moving over to work with an adult population who have committed crimes and have been incarcerated in the County Jail. I know the techniques needed to facilitate a person to deal more effectively with angry feelings so that his or her relationships can be repaired and blossom and they can enjoy life to the fullest.

Anger is often misunderstood- associated with aggressive or violent behaviors. Anger is actually a powerful "inner" reaction, a life energy that is arising as a protest against mistreatment or pain- sometimes a way to stand up for oneself. Thus, in my work, we learn how to harness the bodily feel and energy of anger- in order to sense its meaning, and to experience its power. From there, we often discover underlying pain, hurt, trauma, fear- which we can also experience and process. We learn to identify triggers for angry reactions- and develop tools to harness this energy, rather than let it act out in destructive ways. Anger therapy is a thus bodily process of healing, restoring spirit.

I treat individuals with histories of trauma. Many adults walk away from abusive childhoods and find themselves acting in angry ways as adults. Anger is only a way that people cope with hardship, and we will work together to learn better ways to cope. Anger is only a symptom-- it does not define you. Anger can mask fear, anxiety, and insecurity. We will work together to find the true underlying issues causing anger. With hard work, you may see the anger melt away over time. I feel our society sees anger as a dirty or shameful part of our mental health, but this must change. You will not be treated poorly in my practice if you are making the effort to learn to cope better!

Anger management counseling can help to identify stressors and learn the steps to stay calm in the face of anger. The goal is to handle tense situations in more constructive and positive ways by reducing the emotional and physical arousal that anger can cause. It will provide the tools to take back your life and resolve the triggers that result in unplanned anger reactions.