Anger Management and Counseling in Scotts Valley, CA.

Anger is a valid feeling, but it's the behavior, what we do with anger, that is problematic. Anger can tell us that something isn't right in the current moment. It may also be the result of valid anger you developed as a child and/or it may just be a result of something you believe. There are many ways that anger can be resolved - by changing thoughts & beliefs, learning to express feelings & needs and learning to calm & soothe ourselves by doing what is called, "regulating the nervous system" in order to stay present, grounded & calm when relating to others.

When you are struggling to manage anger, there can often be feelings of shame, guilt and sadness due to feeling like anger is out of control. I can support you in improving how you experience strong emotions such as anger and reduce the impact anger has on your life and relationships. I am experienced in several approaches to the work of Anger Management, including CBT, DBT and Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR). I can support you in gaining and practicing skills to manage anger in a way that allows you to better understand and articulate what you are thinking and feeling, which will help you improve your relationships and lead to an overall better sense of self.

Under the umbrella of anger, resides a host of other negative emotions, to tender to express. Discovering the root of the anger, resolves the anger. Management of anger should not be the final skill to handle anger. Resolving the anger so that little management is needed, is my strategy. EMDR therapy helps with this task of uncovering the source and processing what happened. A high level of anger carried in one's system, consistently stresses the body and the brain, lowering serotonin levels and causing numerous physical ailments. If your anger has worn you down, please phone me for a consultation about EMDR for anger remedy, a more permanent solution to cooling off the anger.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

If you struggle with anger, therapy can help. Many people find that anger is the easiest emotion for them to access. Maybe under the anger you are hurt, lonely, afraid, jealous, sad or ashamed. Wouldn't it be great to have a whole range of emotions again? I use mindfulness to help you learn to sooth your nervous system and psychodynamic therapy to identify what's behind your anger. If you have experienced difficult or traumatic events that are weighing you down, EMDR therapy can free you up to live and act in the present.

A response to life's events falls upon a continuum from neutral to highly-reactive. At times anger, Gandhi called it "Righteous Indignation," is necessary to respond to injustices or inappropriate behaviours. However, uncontrolled, inappropriate anger is destructive to one's self and others. Mindfulness and Metta (Loving Kindness) meditations are excellent tools to deal with anger. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) also called Tapping, along with skillful use of affirmations can help to cool the fires of anger. The benefits of anger management lead to a regulating of emotions and thus a gaining of peace of mind, positive relationships, career and family security.

If you are grappling with anger that negatively impacts your live, you will find solace and transformation through anger management therapy. My specialized approach emphasizes improved somatic awareness, allowing recognition and understanding of the physical sensations tied to anger. By fostering a better understanding of emotional patterns, you will be guided to uncover the triggers and underlying causes of the anger. Personalized therapy equips you with the confidence and skills to exert emotional control over a wide range of emotions, leading to more harmonious relationships and a more balanced life. This journey is not just about managing anger, but about unlocking a more peaceful self.

I provide individual psychotherapy for anger management. Anger is normal emotion that everyone experiences. It becomes a problem when one expresses anger inappropriately or one lacks the proficiency to express any emotions but anger. I use Humanistic and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) to help my clients understand their anger, improve their emotional experience, and express their emotions in healthy ways. A healthy emotional life is the cornerstone of living a full and successful life.

Helping clients overcome anger requires a combination of understanding the root causes of their anger, teaching them coping strategies, and promoting healthier ways of expressing and managing their emotions. I teach clients mindfulness and relaxation techniques to manage intense emotions. Deep breathing, meditation, and progressive muscle relaxation can help reduce anger responses. We work to recognize the physical sensations that accompany anger and how to intervene before anger escalates. Clients work with me on problem-solving strategies to address the situations or triggers that lead to anger. I help them break down problems into manageable steps and brainstorm potential solutions.

Anger can often feel so overwhelming that it causes you to do things you later regret. Not knowing what came over you, there are many unanswered questions: why do I keep doing this? why can't I stop myself? Sometimes, alcohol, substances, or other addictive behaviours lead to this anger, making it more difficult to control. As an addiction counsellor, I help clients overcome addictions leading to anger issues so they can regain a sense of control, rebuild relationships, and gain clarity about how to move forward. If you are unsure where to start, send me a message and I can help. If I'm not the right fit, I can connect you to the right support so you can start gaining back control, today.

Anger is one of our fundamental emotions, part of the basic machinery of our mind and personality. In some ways it is a useful tool that helps to motivate and energize us in seeking fairness and justice in the world around us. But this powerful hold-over from our primal history can also be enormously destructive if we lose control of it. If your anger is slipping out of your control and you find yourself saying or doing things that damage your reputation or your relationships, hurt those around you, or otherwise consistently put you on the outside of society's expectations for behavior, you need help to find tools or strategies to change this and I would be happy to help.

Do you regularly find yourself frustrated and angry at the people you want to be closest to and that you love the most? Do you strive to stay calm and balanced, but then find yourself going off on people at home or at work? I work with people to recognize how anger comes from unenforceable rules you create for how others, or you yourself, "should" behave. Unrealistic rules create expectations that you waste your life & energy trying to enforce in yourself and others. We will work together to understand the rules you have made that are realistic and helpful, and to give you the choice to change the rules that are creating unnecessary grief for you and the people who want to be close to you.

Anger management counseling can help to identify stressors and learn the steps to stay calm in the face of anger. The goal is to handle tense situations in more constructive and positive ways by reducing the emotional and physical arousal that anger can cause. It will provide the tools to take back your life and resolve the triggers that result in unplanned anger reactions.

In anger management sessions with me, you will learn to identify triggers and early warning signs of your anger in order to feel more in control of the experience of this emotion. By better understanding your unique anger process, you will get through this feeling more quickly in the future as well as with more peace and less damage to relationships. I will teach you valuable relaxation, conflict resolution, and relapse prevention skills so that you can stay calmer in triggering situations even after completing therapy. Call me with any questions or to schedule an initial appointment.

I do not believe in "anger management". Instead, I believe in being in control of your emotions - including anger. My clients discover how to be in control of their feelings of anger or rage - instead of the anger or rage controlling them. My clients discover how they can feel anger, but then choose more effective and productive ways of expressing themselves - in ways that no longer lead to regret or hurt - but rather in ways they feel proud and good about.

I aim to help my clients gain a better understanding of their emotions and how to manage them. My practice specializes in anger management and provides tools and techniques to help people maintain stable emotions, stronger relationships, and better communication. I also offer psychoanalytically informed counseling, which helps clients gain insight into their unconscious thoughts and behavior. With my understanding of the human mind, I am able to provide my clients with the support they need to make positive changes in their lives.

ANGER....something that we all have negative (if not traumatic) experience with. We are taught from a young age that it is no o.k. to feel or express anger. Unfortunately, simply because we ignore or suppress does not mean that it disappears. If left unacknowledged, it remains in our minds, hearts, and bodies. Further, the inappropriate expression of (or LACK of healthy expression) can cause severe damage to our most cherished relationships. Therapy is the ideal place for articulating, as well as learning how to effectively express, our anger. Remember, anger is only an internal alarm system telling us that something needs attention. It's what we do with it that matters.

Many of us experience anger and/or rage in the course of our relationships. Anger in and of itself is not a problem - in fact its a good way to let you know that there is some vulnerable feeling underneath that is too painful to reach just yet. Its what we DO with our anger that gets us in trouble. I can teach you tools to manage your anger without denying your entitlement to it.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

I help people struggling with anger management by working with them to develop awareness of their anger experience in their body and mind and how it is impacting their body. I help you learn and practice strategies for regulating your body and mind so you do not lose control of the anger. I help you to learn healthy communication of anger, and the development of conflict resolution skills. I support you in exploring issues of transference from past relationships and experiences that may be contributing to your strong feelings of anger in present circumstances and relationships. We create safety, increase positive expression of anger, and reduce or eliminate sources of anger when possible!