Anger Management and Counseling in San Marino, CA.

I work closely with my clients and their families in identifying the triggers and body cues which preceed an anger episode. Focusing on being in touch with ones emotional experience prior to an outburst allows my clients to begin to identify and disrupt this behavioral pattern prior to a full meltdown. Behaviors are much easier to change before full escalation, and working with my clients and families on identifying these clues and implimenting effective coping strategies is a pivotal part of change.

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.

Feeling out of control can be extremely distressing, destructive, and can have a lasting impact on your relationships with others. Learning how to manage your emotions and effectively deal with anger is an important goal, and one that can be accomplished through active participation in therapy. The goals is for our clients to leave therapy with the skills and confidence that they can manage the challenges that come with everyday life. Learning such skills will directly help with increasing the quality of your relationships and decrease the negative impact of your anger in areas such as work, school, and family difficulties. It can also potentially help avoid any negative legal outcomes.

Anger is very closely correlated to depression and is in fact one of its symptoms. When people get labeled as having "anger issues" I as a therapist suspect that there is some form of underlying depression and in most cases early childhood trauma. I use cognitive behavioral therapy, but I also use psycho-dynamic psychotherapy to get down to the root of the underlying reasons for the anger.

Anger can be a difficult beast to manage that can fracture or relationships and create guilt and shame, but it is possible to treat it. With the aid of tools like EMDR CBT and guided visualizations I can help you overcome this issue and heal from the issues that drive it. Additionally, I can provide tools, coping skills, and other resources to help you manage this particular issue.

Anger is one of our fundamental emotions, part of the basic machinery of our mind and personality. In some ways it is a useful tool that helps to motivate and energize us in seeking fairness and justice in the world around us. But this powerful hold-over from our primal history can also be enormously destructive if we lose control of it. If your anger is slipping out of your control and you find yourself saying or doing things that damage your reputation or your relationships, hurt those around you, or otherwise consistently put you on the outside of society's expectations for behavior, you need help to find tools or strategies to change this and I would be happy to help.

I do not believe in "anger management". Instead, I believe in being in control of your emotions - including anger. My clients discover how to be in control of their feelings of anger or rage - instead of the anger or rage controlling them. My clients discover how they can feel anger, but then choose more effective and productive ways of expressing themselves - in ways that no longer lead to regret or hurt - but rather in ways they feel proud and good about.

Anger is a valid feeling, but it's the behavior, what we do with anger, that is problematic. Anger can tell us that something isn't right in the current moment. It may also be the result of valid anger you developed as a child and/or it may just be a result of something you believe. There are many ways that anger can be resolved - by changing thoughts & beliefs, learning to express feelings & needs and learning to calm & soothe ourselves by doing what is called, "regulating the nervous system" in order to stay present, grounded & calm when relating to others.