Anger Management and Counseling in San Leandro, CA.

IS ANGER MAKING YOUR LIFE MORE DIFFICULT? Are concerned about losing your relationships or job due to anger? Have you tried ways to control it but nothing worked? I can help you learn effective strategies to manage your mental state so that you will be in control of your life instead of being the slave of your emotions. Call me for a free telephone consultation session today to be one step closer to the kind of life you truly want.

Anger can be a difficult beast to manage that can fracture or relationships and create guilt and shame, but it is possible to treat it. With the aid of tools like EMDR CBT and guided visualizations I can help you overcome this issue and heal from the issues that drive it. Additionally, I can provide tools, coping skills, and other resources to help you manage this particular issue.

If you struggle with anger, therapy can help. Many people find that anger is the easiest emotion for them to access. Maybe under the anger you are hurt, lonely, afraid, jealous, sad or ashamed. Wouldn't it be great to have a whole range of emotions again? I use mindfulness to help you learn to sooth your nervous system and psychodynamic therapy to identify what's behind your anger. If you have experienced difficult or traumatic events that are weighing you down, EMDR therapy can free you up to live and act in the present.

Anger is wired into all of us and is essential for survival. It is an intelligent emotion. It can also be incredibly destructive. Most of the time, it is a secondary emotion which means that an unmet need or another emotion is the driving force behind our anger. I will help you to safely identify what is behind your anger and give you tools to effectively regulate it. (I will also help you heal and enhance any relationships previously damaged by your anger.)

A response to life's events falls upon a continuum from neutral to highly-reactive. At times anger, Gandhi called it "Righteous Indignation," is necessary to respond to injustices or inappropriate behaviours. However, uncontrolled, inappropriate anger is destructive to one's self and others. Mindfulness and Metta (Loving Kindness) meditations are excellent tools to deal with anger. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) also called Tapping, along with skillful use of affirmations can help to cool the fires of anger. The benefits of anger management lead to a regulating of emotions and thus a gaining of peace of mind, positive relationships, career and family security.

I focus on providing a constructive and empathetic approach to help clients understand and regulate their emotions. By creating a safe space for clients to explore the roots of their anger, I assist them in identifying triggers and underlying issues that contribute to their emotional responses. Using evidence-based strategies, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and mindfulness techniques, clients learn practical skills to manage their anger effectively and develop healthier coping mechanisms. This approach not only aids in reducing immediate anger outbursts but also fosters long-term emotional resilience and improved interpersonal relationships.

My approach to anger management is helping my client see what the underlying feelings, thoughts, and beliefs are that are driving them to act out there feelings through anger, and learn how to drop beneath the anger to the fear and/or pain that always underlies anger. Through doing this we can learn to express our vulnerability and share our feelings in a safe and healthy manner.

Where there is smoke there is fire. Likewise, where there is interpersonal conflict, invariably there is frustration and anger. This is no less true between couples and in marriage relationships. And while there may be legitimate reasons to become angry, over time such hostility will become counter-productive, hurting the marriage. I utilize a clinically proven 3-step plan for getting to the source of the anger and resolving it. This approach to anger management fits perfectly within my overall process of resolving conflict between couples and enhancing relationship enjoyment.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwaive optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161

Angry outbursts usually reflect an autonomic nervous system that is dysregulated from unresolved trauma and accumulated stress response. Not only do I work with you to give you new tools and ways to put a stop sign between the stimulus and your anger reponse, but using the tools of Somatic Experiencing we can actually discharge that fight or flight energy that is backed up behind the dam waiting to explode. This will leave you feeling calm and well regulated in the face of daily stresses and encounters.

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.

Is your anger ruining your relationships or limiting your success at work? Are you feeling trapped in negative cycles of communication? Are people avoiding you or telling you it’s time to change? Do you want to feel more in control, able to master your triggers? Do you want to feel better, repair broken relationships, and regain closeness? I've helped hundreds of people just like you to feel stronger and repair broken relationships. I teach you concrete mindfulness skills that can being to change your patterns right away and lower your distress and feelings of helplessness. I help you get out of old stuck roles of victim, rescuer or bully that keep you trapped repeating old negative cycl....

Anger can feel overwhelming, out of control an this is not a good feeling. Learning how to manage this anger can help you regain a sense of control and confidence within yourself. It can be helpful to understand what might be triggering this anger. The more you can understand yourself and your behaviors, you then will have the ability to change the unwanted reactions that have probably created many negative consequences for you. Together we can work on your anger management goals and I will support you through this process.

Anger is not, in itself, a dangerous or negative thing. Anger, like all emotions has a purpose that usually speaks to something that feels unfair or unjust and/or the frustration of blocked needs/desires. But when anger gets out of hand, when we can't control it, it can be emotionally debilitating and can ruin our relationships, our piece of mind, even our livelihoods. The damage isn't just limited to the individual challenged with anger either. The fear, sadness, and anger it creates for those we love has a destruction path all its own. Luckily, therapy can help you to manage this potentially damaging emotion, so that you can reduce the destruction anger can create.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

I help men and teens who are struggling with anger management, transform their lives. You will benefit from psychotherapy by 1) learning to control your emotions in the moment, and 2) reducing your vulnerability to becoming overwhelmed and destructively angry in the first place. Relying on more than 10 years experience working with men, I will teach you how to monitor your state of physiological arousal so that you can intervene before you lose control. I will also help you explore the origins of your anger, in other words, where you "learned" to be angry in the first place. Gradually, you will gain a sense of emotional freedom and power as you increase your control and self-awareness.

Anger has both harmful and healthy/constructive potential depending on how it is dealt with. If you are coming to therapy for anger management, you are probably experiencing anger as interfering with your relationships, your work, or your general wellbeing. Sometimes a propensity towards anger signals that other things may be going on--stress, shame, or other feelings that may be hard to tolerate. In an atmosphere of acceptance and non judgment, we will work with mindfulness to build tolerance for a wider range of feelings, to find ease and to uncover the gems hidden beneath reactive anger.

Anger can feel like an all consuming reaction to something other may have done to you intentionally or unintentionally. However, we always wind up on dealing with the aftermath of our anger when we didn't even feel like we were in control of the situation. If this is happening, we will working on developing anger management strategies. We will identify those common words or behaviors that set us off and try to better understand our anger in the beginning stages. This will allow us to start establishing and using coping strategies that will put us in control. Ideally, these techniques and strategies will help improve our relationships with those that we want to spend time with.

Anger is a valid feeling, but it's the behavior, what we do with anger, that is problematic. Anger can tell us that something isn't right in the current moment. It may also be the result of valid anger you developed as a child and/or it may just be a result of something you believe. There are many ways that anger can be resolved - by changing thoughts & beliefs, learning to express feelings & needs and learning to calm & soothe ourselves by doing what is called, "regulating the nervous system" in order to stay present, grounded & calm when relating to others.

Anger is a natural feeling that everyone experiences. It is what we do with out anger, how we handle it, that can cause us trouble. I help my clients understand their thoughts and their reactions by beginning with an understanding of what happens in their bodies when they get angry and or frustrated (they go hand in hand). We look at ways to recognize when anger is building and importantly to recognize the triggers, what is going on just before the feelings build. Together we explore the thoughts and feelings, help change some of those thoughts and learn important ways to manage them.

I do not believe in "anger management". Instead, I believe in being in control of your emotions - including anger. My clients discover how to be in control of their feelings of anger or rage - instead of the anger or rage controlling them. My clients discover how they can feel anger, but then choose more effective and productive ways of expressing themselves - in ways that no longer lead to regret or hurt - but rather in ways they feel proud and good about.

Anger is a damn tricky emotion. It can feel like it takes the driver's seat when it comes. It can feel terrible and bitter, or powerful and justified. However it feels, you probably already know that it can be hurtful to those around you and ultimately to yourself. Managing the immediate feeling of anger so you don't do and say things you regret is part of the answer, but not all of it. We need to figure out what makes you angry. There are often understandable reasons to be angry, but it helps to know why you are, because you don't want to end up expressing it toward the wrong people or to a level of severity that doesn't make sense.

Anger is one of our fundamental emotions, part of the basic machinery of our mind and personality. In some ways it is a useful tool that helps to motivate and energize us in seeking fairness and justice in the world around us. But this powerful hold-over from our primal history can also be enormously destructive if we lose control of it. If your anger is slipping out of your control and you find yourself saying or doing things that damage your reputation or your relationships, hurt those around you, or otherwise consistently put you on the outside of society's expectations for behavior, you need help to find tools or strategies to change this and I would be happy to help.

More than 20 years ago, I had an "Anger Management" problem. I know what it is like to try to keep it under control to only find myself saying cruel things I wish I didn't say. It destroyed a relationship. However, that inspired me to learn how to deal with my anger in a healthy way. I was highly motivated; it took me less than 12 sessions. If you struggle with your anger, we will come up with real strategies that help you pay attention to what is going on in your body so we can prevent the angry outbursts from happening. You may need somebody who can challenge you and keep you in check while at the same time not judging you. Your next step is to call me to make an appointment.

I help people struggling with anger management by working with them to develop awareness of their anger experience in their body and mind and how it is impacting their body. I help you learn and practice strategies for regulating your body and mind so you do not lose control of the anger. I help you to learn healthy communication of anger, and the development of conflict resolution skills. I support you in exploring issues of transference from past relationships and experiences that may be contributing to your strong feelings of anger in present circumstances and relationships. We create safety, increase positive expression of anger, and reduce or eliminate sources of anger when possible!