Anger Management and Counseling in Long Beach, CA.

Anger is a healthy expression of emotion. When anger and rage become the dominating emotion that rules our actions, a potentially serious problem exists. When this occurs we feel out of control, even frightened by the intensity of feeling. Scared by life altering actions and repercussions. We become lost and confused. We know this is not me but yet it is. This mystery is solvable. Sometimes when negative experiences happen we hide and bury them, We do this so well we forget why the anger is there. Over the years these experiences multiply, fester and grow. A time bomb waiting to be triggered. We can help you unearth the issues, defuse and help you to dismantle the bomb. Call! We can help.

I help people struggling with anger management by working with them to develop awareness of their anger experience in their body and mind and how it is impacting their body. I help you learn and practice strategies for regulating your body and mind so you do not lose control of the anger. I help you to learn healthy communication of anger, and the development of conflict resolution skills. I support you in exploring issues of transference from past relationships and experiences that may be contributing to your strong feelings of anger in present circumstances and relationships. We create safety, increase positive expression of anger, and reduce or eliminate sources of anger when possible!

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

With a partner, I have developed a new and effective model of anger management that teaches you eight proven tools for anger control. These skill-based tools include; (1) reducing stress in your life, (2) developing empathy, (3)learning to respond instead of react, (4) changing self-talk, (5) communicating assertively, (6) adjusting expectations, (7) learning to forgive, and (8) retreating and thinking things over. These tools are taught to clients both in individual consultation and in anger management classes. They are also taught in online anger management programs I have produced.

Anger is one of our fundamental emotions, part of the basic machinery of our mind and personality. In some ways it is a useful tool that helps to motivate and energize us in seeking fairness and justice in the world around us. But this powerful hold-over from our primal history can also be enormously destructive if we lose control of it. If your anger is slipping out of your control and you find yourself saying or doing things that damage your reputation or your relationships, hurt those around you, or otherwise consistently put you on the outside of society's expectations for behavior, you need help to find tools or strategies to change this and I would be happy to help.

Anger management counseling will help you recognize what makes you angry, as well as many other intense emotions felt throughout the body. We will explore thought processes, triggers, raise awareness and provide tools for each individual case. Counseling will help create problem solving techniques as well as identify different communication styles (assertive vs. aggressive). Everyone feels angry, the anger is not the problem, rather the forms of expression.

Anger can often feel so overwhelming that it causes you to do things you later regret. Not knowing what came over you, there are many unanswered questions: why do I keep doing this? why can't I stop myself? Sometimes, alcohol, substances, or other addictive behaviours lead to this anger, making it more difficult to control. As an addiction counsellor, I help clients overcome addictions leading to anger issues so they can regain a sense of control, rebuild relationships, and gain clarity about how to move forward. If you are unsure where to start, send me a message and I can help. If I'm not the right fit, I can connect you to the right support so you can start gaining back control, today.

Anger is a valid feeling, but it's the behavior, what we do with anger, that is problematic. Anger can tell us that something isn't right in the current moment. It may also be the result of valid anger you developed as a child and/or it may just be a result of something you believe. There are many ways that anger can be resolved - by changing thoughts & beliefs, learning to express feelings & needs and learning to calm & soothe ourselves by doing what is called, "regulating the nervous system" in order to stay present, grounded & calm when relating to others.

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.