Anger Management and Counseling in Grand Terrace, CA.

Need help with your anger? You may have experienced anger leading to domestic violence, assault, incarceration, or other detrimental outcomes. You may feel that you are trapped in a cycle of uncontrollable anger that you can't get free from, but Dr. Quinlan has helped many others to discover that they can break this cycle and live a life where anger is managed. Dr. Quinlan has many years of experience leading support groups and individual counseling with a focus on anger management. Once you understand how to manage your anger effectively, then you can use this valuable emotion to motivate you in healthy ways so that you can experience positive growth and fulfillment in your relationships.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

Anger is one of our fundamental emotions, part of the basic machinery of our mind and personality. In some ways it is a useful tool that helps to motivate and energize us in seeking fairness and justice in the world around us. But this powerful hold-over from our primal history can also be enormously destructive if we lose control of it. If your anger is slipping out of your control and you find yourself saying or doing things that damage your reputation or your relationships, hurt those around you, or otherwise consistently put you on the outside of society's expectations for behavior, you need help to find tools or strategies to change this and I would be happy to help.

A response to life's events falls upon a continuum from neutral to highly-reactive. At times anger, Gandhi called it "Righteous Indignation," is necessary to respond to injustices or inappropriate behaviours. However, uncontrolled, inappropriate anger is destructive to one's self and others. Mindfulness and Metta (Loving Kindness) meditations are excellent tools to deal with anger. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) also called Tapping, along with skillful use of affirmations can help to cool the fires of anger. The benefits of anger management lead to a regulating of emotions and thus a gaining of peace of mind, positive relationships, career and family security.

Managing anger is more complicated than many people think. The chemicals that are released during an angry/raging episode are similar to the ones released during vigorous exercise and can actually become addicting. That is why angry outbursts seem to get worse over time. It's important to get highly directive therapy to learn how to identify triggers for outbursts and to learn coping skills that will help you avoid the negative consequences of out-of-control anger.

Using tools for anger issues accelerates your capacity to truly heal, when just saying no or talking to yourself isn't enough! And let's face it, good advice doesn't work with anger! Tools help you use the healthier, highest-functioning part of your personality to manage your moods and reactions. Anger is often a result of triggered feelings that have been buried and surface in your adult life as explosive reactions. Yes there are tools to use to manage these triggered reactions. Talk therapy and good advice is not enough!

Anger is usually an emotion covering up another emotion. When a child is depressed, you will see anger outbursts. I will assist my client's in identifying the underlining cause of the anger and assist them in finding the tools to manage those emotions. I will also work with you in finding ways to manage your anger and find more peace in your life.

I help people struggling with anger management by working with them to develop awareness of their anger experience in their body and mind and how it is impacting their body. I help you learn and practice strategies for regulating your body and mind so you do not lose control of the anger. I help you to learn healthy communication of anger, and the development of conflict resolution skills. I support you in exploring issues of transference from past relationships and experiences that may be contributing to your strong feelings of anger in present circumstances and relationships. We create safety, increase positive expression of anger, and reduce or eliminate sources of anger when possible!

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.

Where there is smoke there is fire. Likewise, where there is interpersonal conflict, invariably there is frustration and anger. This is no less true between couples and in marriage relationships. And while there may be legitimate reasons to become angry, over time such hostility will become counter-productive, hurting the marriage. I utilize a clinically proven 3-step plan for getting to the source of the anger and resolving it. This approach to anger management fits perfectly within my overall process of resolving conflict between couples and enhancing relationship enjoyment.