Anger Management and Counseling in Discovery Bay, CA.

Angry outbursts usually reflect an autonomic nervous system that is dysregulated from unresolved trauma and accumulated stress response. Not only do I work with you to give you new tools and ways to put a stop sign between the stimulus and your anger reponse, but using the tools of Somatic Experiencing we can actually discharge that fight or flight energy that is backed up behind the dam waiting to explode. This will leave you feeling calm and well regulated in the face of daily stresses and encounters.

I treat individuals with histories of trauma. Many adults walk away from abusive childhoods and find themselves acting in angry ways as adults. Anger is only a way that people cope with hardship, and we will work together to learn better ways to cope. Anger is only a symptom-- it does not define you. Anger can mask fear, anxiety, and insecurity. We will work together to find the true underlying issues causing anger. With hard work, you may see the anger melt away over time. I feel our society sees anger as a dirty or shameful part of our mental health, but this must change. You will not be treated poorly in my practice if you are making the effort to learn to cope better!

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.

I help people struggling with anger management by working with them to develop awareness of their anger experience in their body and mind and how it is impacting their body. I help you learn and practice strategies for regulating your body and mind so you do not lose control of the anger. I help you to learn healthy communication of anger, and the development of conflict resolution skills. I support you in exploring issues of transference from past relationships and experiences that may be contributing to your strong feelings of anger in present circumstances and relationships. We create safety, increase positive expression of anger, and reduce or eliminate sources of anger when possible!

Although anger is an emotion that we were all born with, it is also a choice. Jesus said don't be quick to anger and don't sin in your anger, but He never said don't be angry. We all have this emotion - it is only a matter of controlling and taming it. It is a choice. I give my clients tools that help them achieve that goal. Anger is a lot of energy that can be used for good - it's just the matter of knowing how and I help with that.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

Anger can feel like an all consuming reaction to something other may have done to you intentionally or unintentionally. However, we always wind up on dealing with the aftermath of our anger when we didn't even feel like we were in control of the situation. If this is happening, we will working on developing anger management strategies. We will identify those common words or behaviors that set us off and try to better understand our anger in the beginning stages. This will allow us to start establishing and using coping strategies that will put us in control. Ideally, these techniques and strategies will help improve our relationships with those that we want to spend time with.

Anger is a valid feeling, but it's the behavior, what we do with anger, that is problematic. Anger can tell us that something isn't right in the current moment. It may also be the result of valid anger you developed as a child and/or it may just be a result of something you believe. There are many ways that anger can be resolved - by changing thoughts & beliefs, learning to express feelings & needs and learning to calm & soothe ourselves by doing what is called, "regulating the nervous system" in order to stay present, grounded & calm when relating to others.

Anger can damage relationships and erode ones own self-esteem. Together we will explore and identify the source of anger as well as learning anger management skill. With identifying the source and the use of skills, you will be able to maintain more balance in your life, balance in your emotions, improve relationships, and improved self-esteem.

Anger can be a difficult beast to manage that can fracture or relationships and create guilt and shame, but it is possible to treat it. With the aid of tools like EMDR CBT and guided visualizations I can help you overcome this issue and heal from the issues that drive it. Additionally, I can provide tools, coping skills, and other resources to help you manage this particular issue.