Anger Management and Counseling in Castro Valley, CA.

I do not believe in "anger management". Instead, I believe in being in control of your emotions - including anger. My clients discover how to be in control of their feelings of anger or rage - instead of the anger or rage controlling them. My clients discover how they can feel anger, but then choose more effective and productive ways of expressing themselves - in ways that no longer lead to regret or hurt - but rather in ways they feel proud and good about.

If you are grappling with anger that negatively impacts your live, you will find solace and transformation through anger management therapy. My specialized approach emphasizes improved somatic awareness, allowing recognition and understanding of the physical sensations tied to anger. By fostering a better understanding of emotional patterns, you will be guided to uncover the triggers and underlying causes of the anger. Personalized therapy equips you with the confidence and skills to exert emotional control over a wide range of emotions, leading to more harmonious relationships and a more balanced life. This journey is not just about managing anger, but about unlocking a more peaceful self.

I focus on providing a constructive and empathetic approach to help clients understand and regulate their emotions. By creating a safe space for clients to explore the roots of their anger, I assist them in identifying triggers and underlying issues that contribute to their emotional responses. Using evidence-based strategies, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and mindfulness techniques, clients learn practical skills to manage their anger effectively and develop healthier coping mechanisms. This approach not only aids in reducing immediate anger outbursts but also fosters long-term emotional resilience and improved interpersonal relationships.

I believe that there is a difference between anger and rage. Anger is a controllable expression of our emotions. Anger can tell us when we have had our boundaries violated or if we feel something complex and difficult to understand or if we are reminded about something in our past that is triggering us. Anger does not have to result in hurting others. Rage is often out of control and can be very hurtful. Please note: I am not an anger management specialist and if you are seeking court ordered therapy please look for a therapist who specializes in anger management, however I can offer support around how to navigate general anger explorations.

Anger can be a difficult beast to manage that can fracture or relationships and create guilt and shame, but it is possible to treat it. With the aid of tools like EMDR CBT and guided visualizations I can help you overcome this issue and heal from the issues that drive it. Additionally, I can provide tools, coping skills, and other resources to help you manage this particular issue.

Anger is a damn tricky emotion. It can feel like it takes the driver's seat when it comes. It can feel terrible and bitter, or powerful and justified. However it feels, you probably already know that it can be hurtful to those around you and ultimately to yourself. Managing the immediate feeling of anger so you don't do and say things you regret is part of the answer, but not all of it. We need to figure out what makes you angry. There are often understandable reasons to be angry, but it helps to know why you are, because you don't want to end up expressing it toward the wrong people or to a level of severity that doesn't make sense.

My approach to anger management is helping my client see what the underlying feelings, thoughts, and beliefs are that are driving them to act out there feelings through anger, and learn how to drop beneath the anger to the fear and/or pain that always underlies anger. Through doing this we can learn to express our vulnerability and share our feelings in a safe and healthy manner.

Anger is not, in itself, a dangerous or negative thing. Anger, like all emotions has a purpose that usually speaks to something that feels unfair or unjust and/or the frustration of blocked needs/desires. But when anger gets out of hand, when we can't control it, it can be emotionally debilitating and can ruin our relationships, our piece of mind, even our livelihoods. The damage isn't just limited to the individual challenged with anger either. The fear, sadness, and anger it creates for those we love has a destruction path all its own. Luckily, therapy can help you to manage this potentially damaging emotion, so that you can reduce the destruction anger can create.

More than 20 years ago, I had an "Anger Management" problem. I know what it is like to try to keep it under control to only find myself saying cruel things I wish I didn't say. It destroyed a relationship. However, that inspired me to learn how to deal with my anger in a healthy way. I was highly motivated; it took me less than 12 sessions. If you struggle with your anger, we will come up with real strategies that help you pay attention to what is going on in your body so we can prevent the angry outbursts from happening. You may need somebody who can challenge you and keep you in check while at the same time not judging you. Your next step is to call me to make an appointment.

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.

Anger has both harmful and healthy/constructive potential depending on how it is dealt with. If you are coming to therapy for anger management, you are probably experiencing anger as interfering with your relationships, your work, or your general wellbeing. Sometimes a propensity towards anger signals that other things may be going on--stress, shame, or other feelings that may be hard to tolerate. In an atmosphere of acceptance and non judgment, we will work with mindfulness to build tolerance for a wider range of feelings, to find ease and to uncover the gems hidden beneath reactive anger.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Anger can often feel so overwhelming that it causes you to do things you later regret. Not knowing what came over you, there are many unanswered questions: why do I keep doing this? why can't I stop myself? Sometimes, alcohol, substances, or other addictive behaviours lead to this anger, making it more difficult to control. As an addiction counsellor, I help clients overcome addictions leading to anger issues so they can regain a sense of control, rebuild relationships, and gain clarity about how to move forward. If you are unsure where to start, send me a message and I can help. If I'm not the right fit, I can connect you to the right support so you can start gaining back control, today.