Family Counselling Services in Gulf Islands, BC.

Troubled relationships with family members can be a source of immense stress. You may be struggling with parenting concerns such as adjusting to the arrival of a baby, coping with the needs of young children, dealing with a rebellious teenager, or launching a young adult. Perhaps you are feeling exhausted from caregiver stress as you look after aging parents. You might be confused and hurt by strained relationships with extended family, including in-laws and adult children. Family counselling can help you gain confidence as a parent as you learn to deal effectively with children, teens, and young adults. I can help you gain insight and learn strategies to enable you to attain mutually satisf....

Family dynamics can be a complicated and sensitive balance within a home. This can be made increasingly complicated by divorce, blended families, individual parenting, spiritual values, health issues and much more. Counseling can provide family members a neutral voice and a place to be heard when fighting and arguing is impacting daily functioning and happiness, of one or more family members. We also help develop necessary tools to resolve conflict in a healthy way, bringing peace and harmony back to everyday lives.

Today family can mean different things to different people. Each family structure is challenged with their own set of difficulties and problems. Whether you are a blended family, single parent family due to divorce or loss, adoptive family, same sex parents, or traditional, we recognize family dynamics can be complicated. Together we will work to develop strong communication skills between each family member, while nurturing and solidifying the family unit. We will work to overcome conflict, heal the wounds of the past, build parenting skills and create a safe environment where all family members can be heard.

Imagine a family as a tree with branches, roots, trunk representing parts of the immediate and extended family. When working with families, all elements are considered. Usually there is a request for family therapy due to one of it's members in crisis, often a child. However, when an analysis of need is done it becomes apparent that more than one member of the family needs help in adjusting, growing and learning new behaviours. Clients contact me for a variety of reasons: to improve communications, solve family problems, support in special situations such as death, divorce, marriage, illness, child or adolescent issues.

Most family therapists inadvertently create more chaos through their well-intentioned efforts to assist a family move through a change process. Why? Brains are inherently deregulated (all of us, may I add) and most talking and dialoguing misses brain-centric problems that need more intensive help. Many times the emotional trauma created by years of solving problems ineffectively can wreak havoc on the brain's parasympathetic nervous system, not ever giving the family a break from flight or fight thinking. Contact us for an innovative neuroscience solution to family dysfunction. Kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

A family is an intricate and complex system of unique individuals. I offer family counselling and relationship counselling within families. My approach considers family development across the lifespan. This approach takes into consideration the needs and challenges that are natural to families and the individuals within families at different stages of life. I am trained in Family Systems; Virginia Satir; Adlerian approaches to family counselling. I also counsel family members who have an adult loved one with a mental illness or substance use problem.

The narcissism-co-dependency (or self-love deficit as described by Ross Rosenberg) pattern begins for many of us in the family unit. Relationships we form early in life shape our templates for relationships later in life. Learning to understand our own patterns of problem behaviours helps us develop self-awareness and opens the door to change. Is there a pattern of power imbalances, control issues, manipulation or even abuse in your family? Learn to see where things are going wrong and develop new coping techniques that help you navigate troubling relationships and build healthy new relationships.

Despite the best intentions of ourselves and our family members, we are often tangled in patterns of invalidation, rejection, frustration and blame. It can feel so messy that we operate in a constant state of fear and a crippling sense of unworthiness. In 2008 I started my counselling career as a family therapist. A combination of individual and joint sessions will take place to allow the space for all voices to be respectfully heard, while helping to identify bigger ‘systems’ patterns that keep you stuck in pain and finger-pointing. I will help to smooth out communication, make room for wants and needs and to heal the old wounds holding you back from having a healthier relationship.

Each family is as unique, as are all relationships. Today, families are not only made up of the traditional two parent same sex couple; but are blended, same sex, single parented, having children raised by grandparents and extended family and friends-more than ever in our history. There are times when all types of families experience difficulties that we can not resolve on our own. As your counsellor, I can provide you with a neutral perspective and provide suggestions and strategies to cope. I can provide a safe environment and provide mediation. All parties will be given an opportunity to express themselves openly, with the benefit of finding a resolution, clarity and peace.

My approach to family therapy is unique. I work with family members affected by their loved one's mental health and/or addictions challenges. Years of experience creating and running family groups of "affected others" contribute to my knowledge base on how to effectively guide families toward living their lives to their fullest, while not giving up hope. Helping families move away from caregiving toward supporting is my specialty!