Great Couples Counselling in Vancouver, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

I specialize in working with pre-marital couples. I'll help you to improve your relational skills so that you’re set up for a future built on trust, connection, and shared values. First, we will focus on your story and help you heal from past hurts or identify your goals for your relationship. Then we will work on developing your skills so that you can experience greater partnership and connection with each other.

Many couples struggle with communication and "feeling heard". Over time a once happy and vibrant relationship can begin to decay through hurt feelings, anger, lack of attention, feeling valued, infidelity, the strain of children, childhood issues, and much more. We focus to heal the wounds of the past and rebuild the love and trust within the relationship. We work to equip both partners with a voice and ability to effectively listen and hear one another. We will work together to establish individual boundaries within the relationship, while creating a stronger and healthier connection. Our goal is to equip each couple with the tools they require for success, independent of counselling

Relationships usually start with lots of love and passion. After a while, however, the miscommunication between partners, their previous traumas, and the everyday stresses of life lead to an unhappy couple. With training in evidence-based approaches to helping couples, I help my clients become mindful of the repeating patterns in their relationship and their roots. We will then work together to change these patterns and create new loving healthy patterns. We will work on helping you communicate your true feelings to your partner without blaming, stonewalling, or criticizing. We will focus on helping you become more vulnerable with your partner so that your emotional bond becomes stronger.

I work with couples using Gottman Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy and Attachment Therapy. I will help you identify your maladaptive patterns of behaviour and improve your communication skills. There is no shame in getting some coaching in how we connect with each other and how we can better meet each others needs. I use a strengths based approach to help you see the positives and remember why you fell in love.

Do you look at your partner and wonder what happened to the sense of connection and intimacy that you once enjoyed? Have the stresses of life, career, and parenting gotten in the way of your relationship? Would you like to learn how to be heard and to hear what is really going on in your partner's heart of hearts? Couples counselling is an opportunity to re-connect and re-discover yourself and your partner. It is a safe forum to air difficult issues , develop skills for effective communication and enhance emotional and physical intimacy.

My role as a couple's therapist to create a safe haven, a calm bay, for you to make the repairs as needed, for you to re-embark on your journey together, stronger, more connected and back on the same team. The storminess of relationships is as natural as waves in the ocean, our ability to stay connect during the swells and crashing waves is what makes or breaks a marriage, not the wave itself. Our work together focuses on identifying our patterns and our partners patterns as we run for cover in the tumult of the wave. We then work on understanding, supporting and staying reconnected.

Our intimate relationships are where our deepest issues arise and our greatest healing can occur. In couples therapy we build on the principles of openness and honesty, creating a safe space where each partner can safely share their deepest needs and concerns. We work on individual awareness of personal issues that each person brings with them from their past while focussing on deepening the connection that they each yearn for.

Healing and growing in our sexuality & eroticism can help us understand ourselves and our partners in ways we may have never been privileged to before. It opens us to the appreciation of the full depth and breadth of human erotic expression. I work with individuals and couples. My approach is informed by training as an Erotic Blueprint Coach, somatic attachment and conscious kink. All forms of love, relationship structures, and sexual expression welcome.

I have been trained in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, the Gottman Method and Family Systems. Typically I meet with the couple together for the first session to get an understanding of the presenting problem from both perspectives. From there I meet with each person individually to take a brief relationship and family history and to form a relationship of trust and safety with each partner. The goal is to identify the negative cycle of communication between partners, identify underlying feelings and fears that drive this cycle and finally to create a more secure bond between the couple. I am very experienced with working with couples where one or both partners have experienced trauma

The research around attachment tells us that having a sense of closeness with others is essential to our well-being. When partners feel a lack of connection, it can touch on past wounds that may even exacerbate the present difficulties. All couples go through challenging times, and it is important that both individuals remain allies, even through trouble. Skilled couples counselling can support this, and help the relationship become stronger than ever before. I draw from a number of approaches when working with couples, especially Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, Solution Focused Brief Therapy, and communication approaches such as Non Violent Communication.

Is telephone counseling possible with couples? Usually face to face couple counseling is preferable but in reality it is not always possible. Couples that I have worked with either have lived in different locations or like many couples with children, have no free time until the children are put to sleep. 9:00 PM on the east coast is only 6:00 PM on the Pacific coast where I am located. If both partners are motivated and feel comfortable on the phone, then telephone counseling can be very helpful. Couples counseling is often centered on improving communication which can easily be addressed through telephone counseling.

Couples therapy with me offers a safe, respectful space to untangle conflict, rebuild connection and strengthen your relationship. Whether you're struggling with communication, trust, or feeling distant, we'll work together to understand what's beneath the surface and create new ways of relating. I support both partners with compassion and curiousity, helping you feel heard and valued. Through honest conversation and practical tools, you can move from stuck patterns toward deeper intimacy, understanding and shared growth -- one conversation at a time.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php