Great Couples Counselling in Lantzville, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

I help couples move beyond conflict and distance by focusing on what lies beneath--the patterns and emotions creating problems. I do this in a gentle, non-judgemental way that allows couples to gain control of their interactions, finding a deeper sense of connection, intimacy, and understanding. By connecting emotionally you can avoid the negative interactions which are often rooted in couples not feeling their partner truly hears them. Couples therapy is an active process of helping you find effective, long-term solutions to gridlock, trust, emotional distance, sexual issues, and more. When your relationship works, everything else in life just works that much better.

Are you and your partner stuck in unsolvable arguments? Does one of you tend to ‘demand’ more while the other shuts down and withdraws? Are you feeling less connected and actually adding stress to each other’s lives instead of reducing it? While frustrating, these are perfectly normal patterns of partnership and there is hope. I would be glad to help you untangle the knots, learning to team up together instead of entering battles over who is right. In doing so, we will unpack past traumas and patterns of behaviour, learning to better communicate and to be safely vulnerable in a way that stands your relationship on solid ground.

I understand that navigating relationship issues can be incredibly challenging, affecting both your emotional health and the quality of your partnership. In our couples counselling sessions, we'll establish a safe environment for open dialogue, employing the Gottman Method to identify and address the root causes of your conflicts. This evidence-based approach focuses on improving communication, building empathy, and fostering mutual respect. While the journey to a healthier relationship may take time and commitment from both sides, there's genuine hope for renewal and happiness. Together, we can work towards a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship.

Couples often seek help when they are unable to resolve common problems and issues. This could be due to a build up of frustrations and disappointment overtime, the loss of affection and caring, an affair, or a traumatic event. A lack of communication, constant disagreements, unfilfilled emotional needs, financial concerns, parenting issues are concerns and the aim to to help couples gain a better understanding of both their partner and themself in order to learn how to interact more positively and effectively. Being an objective third party enables both partners to express themselves in safety, identify and clarify problem areas and determine a compromise where both parties are satisfied

Relationship are complicated and can be difficult. Each partner has had an upbringing, and life experiences that have shaped their values and outlook on life. These may differ from the outlook and values of their partner. Each partner also has their own methods of coping: direct, avoiding, exploding, running, and retreating. As your counsellor, I will help you both explore how your similarities help and hinder your relationship. You will gain a better understanding of why you and your partner 'do what you do'. You will learn effective ways of communicating, problem solving, managing emotions and conflict; in an effort for you both to achieve respect and love.

The relationship is the most important aspect of being human. If we are a couple or in a partnership, it is natural to have struggles and conflicts from time to time. Couples counseling can help deepen intimacy; improve communication and develop skills to resolve conflict in a more loving respectful way. In my practice with couples, I use the Gottman approach and Imago for couples as well as teach conflict/problem resolution skills as part of improving communication skills in the relationship.

Embarking on a transformative journey with Eakin Counselling means recognizing and addressing the conflicts that often surface within relationships. I understand the complexities that can strain even the most loving connections. My relationship counseling services serve as companions on this journey, guiding individuals and couples through communication breakdowns, conflicts, and trust issues, ultimately fostering understanding and love. I believe that nurturing strong and healthy relationships is fundamental to a fulfilling life, and our approach to relationship, couples, and marriage counselling is rooted in deep insights, experience, and a profound understanding of the intricate dynamics

When couples begin therapy we often teach strategies such as fair fighting. Avoiding name calling, staying in the here and now (not bringing up the past), reducing the use of harsh language, speaking for one’s own experience (I statements), sticking to one problem at a time, and reducing the volume of their voices can be useful tools. As therapists, we try to get to know the couple’s individual communication styles, support them when working through conflicts of any size, help foster further intimacy, establish appropriate boundaries, navigate grief and loss, and provide a safe space to explore past issues and hurts. We offer Gottman trained counsellors who can support couples.

We are proud to offer couples/relationship counselling as we all know that relationships can be both incredibly rewarding and tremendously difficult all at the same time. We believe that trust and safety create a solid foundation from which a relationship can grow. Through both the Gottman method and Emotionally-Focused Couples Therapy we are confident that we can support the growth of healthy, secure attachments characterized by healthy attunement and respect.

Loving, successful relationships need to be carefully and skillfully nurtured in the following five areas: Emotional, Intellectual, Spiritual, Sexual, Financial. Couples who are ready to do ongoing work on their relationships are richly rewarded with a loving, meaningful and joyful life together. Committed relationships that have the possibility of morphing into long term relationships benefit greatly by being guided by the Gottman research on relationships as well as Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Premarital Counselling prepares a couple for a new stage in their relationship by identifying potential areas of conflict and strength and developing tools to create a strong foundation.

Couples and families have many different configurations today and the methods we use foster connections between two people. The brains of human beings are naturally wired for relationship with others so when distance occurs between people, unhappiness and loneliness develops. We offer a facilitated method for couples to explore these feelings, learn about the deeper parts of themselves and each other, and repair the distance between them by using the right combination of compassion and directness. Conflict is not the problem -- conflict is normal and healthy when it is done with good communication tools and personal and interpersonal insight.