Anger Management and Counselling in North Cowichan, BC.

I work with adults and youth from a Trauma-Informed and culturally sensitive perspective. My focus in counselling is to provide education about anger and unhealthy behavior, emotional dysregulation, developing empathy for self and others; understanding personal limits, establishing healthy boundaries, and resolving conflict through improved communication and emotional regulation skills. I work within a Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) framework.

Anger often masks other emotions such as sadness, and shame. I work to uncover what is behind acting out in anger to address the root cause. At the same time, I provide ample opportunity for the learning of new skills in order to master how to regulate intense emotions. Benefits include no longer feeling burdened by anger and resentment as well as improved relationships with those around you.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

When anger gets the best of us, we can say and/or do things that we later wish we could change or take back. Anger is an instinctive universal emotion, one in which we all have, but not all expressions of anger have to be hurt. In fact, anger works as a great informant and can motivate us to take action to improve our own lives and the lives of people that we care about.

If a client comes to me with anger management, I would approach them with curiosity and examine the root cause of the anger. Depending on the source of the anger, I would determine what type of approach to use. For example if the anger was caused by a specific event, if the client agrees, we would explore that specific event in detail, as well as practical strategies to manage the existing anger. Approaches I use are Alderian therapy or EFT for treatment.

Anger is not an abnormal reaction, but did you know that it is most often not your first response? In other words, it's what is generated when your first emotional reaction to something or someone isn't identified and dealt with. I help people to understand their primary emotions and then find ways to express them with greater clarity and healthier actions. We'll also explore when anger is appropriate and how you can use that energy to confront whatever you see as the cause in a safer, more effective way. You will never look at anger the same way again.

Our anger can be a sentry, a protector and a wise indicator that our boundaries have been transgressed or that something vitally important to us is threatened. It can also be a raging tyrant, a short fuse, a simmering internalisation that off-gases through passive-aggression, or a childish tantrum. Becoming intimate with our anger is synonymous with becoming intimidate with our power. In anger therapy, we will work to understand the unique way your anger process happens through somatic awareness, mindfulness and emotional intimacy. We will look at your history with anger, your family lineage, and you will learn tools to channel this fire in ways that support rather than hinder your life.

We all experience difficulties from time to time in managing our emotions. We feel anger, frustration, anxiety and irritation. When not properly managed we may experience stress, burnout, and feel unsatisfied with life. Our relationships and parenting skills may suffer. Sometimes this is due to us having too many issues to deal with at once, lack of supports in our lives; and when not taught to us, a lack of skills or resources to cope. Seeking the support of a counsellor can help. I have facilitated anger management workshops, and provided one on one counselling to teach coping and management skills. As a former Forensic Therapist, I am qualified to provide court ordered treatment.

I am honoured that you are interested in my services and I would like to tell you a little bit about myself. I have been described as slightly non-conventional in the counselling world, which suits me perfectly, and also tends to suit youth who are trying to stand up to the force of the problems in their life. I am very comfortable working with this population, and I feel fortunate that I can connect with teens the way I do, conventionally or in a way that makes sense to them.

Anger can be a reaction to a range of experiences, from past traumas to present-day stressors, and EMDR can help to desensitize and reprocess these experiences, reducing the intensity of the emotional response. Through the use of bilateral stimulation, such as eye movements or tapping, EMDR can help to process the distressing memories and emotions, leading to increased emotional regulation and a greater sense of control over one's emotional response. By addressing the underlying emotional triggers, EMDR can help to alleviate symptoms of anger and promote more adaptive coping strategies.